It Was Supposed To Show Me Things

It was supposed to show me what I was putting up with.

People can't act confused when they know what they were doing.
They chose to do those things, right?

Like Mirror Smasher chose to smash my antique family heirloom...
THAT WASN'T AN ACCIDENT.
THAT WASN'T A "MISUNDERSTANDING."

It was supposed to show me:
WHO WAS FOR ME AND WHO WASN'T.

IT SHOWED ME:
WHAT THEY CHOSE TO CHOOSE.

It showed me things about them that they didn't realize they were showing me.

BUT I DIDN'T SEE THAT I COULD LOOK AT THINGS PEOPLE SHOWED ME.
ABOUT THEMSELVES.

ABOUT HOW THEY THOUGHT OF ME....
TO TREAT ME LIKE THAT.

If there's no accountability....
THERE'S NO CHANGE.

IF THERE'S NO RESPECT, NO CHANGE!

NO UNDERSTANDING, NO CHANGE.

NO CHANGE = NO ACCESS.
NO CHANGE = REPEATED BS.

But yeah, all that was sitting heavy on me, still.
After all these years, I guess. 

I don't know why! I thought I got it all out a long time ago!

Maybe it felt even more insulting that nothing had changed... ?
Maybe it felt insulting because it was audacious!
Maybe it felt insulting to who I had to become to get over all of that the first time.
Maybe those and other things.

Maybe a bunch of things I haven't thought of yet.
Maybe more will come up; maybe it won't.

Maybe I'm good now.
Good to go.

Can't "predict" someone who HAD TO CHANGE.
"PEOPLE RARELY VALUE A CERTAINTY."
THEY WERE CERTAIN ABOUT ME, OR SO THEY THOUGHT.

THEY GOT TOO COMFORTABLE.
HAD TO BE....
TO DO ME LIKE THAT....

But it showed me who would do me like that....
AND WHO WOULDN'T.

BECAUSE THOSE WHO WOULDN'T....
WOULDN'T.

They just.... Wouldn't.

Showed me what they WOULD DO....
BECAUSE THEY DID DO THAT.

SHOWED ME WHY THEY DID THAT, TOO.

They can think back to when they were trying to destroy me... 
Or whatever tf they were trying to do.

They wanted to see me down and out.
BECAUSE IT MADE THEM FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEMSELF.

DID THEY WANT TO SEE ME UP AND HAPPY?

PEOPLE WHO TRY TO USE PEOPLE
ARE SCARED TO BE USED AND HURT.

BUT IF YOU DO THAT SH*T TO SOMEONE
WHO WOULDN'T DO THAT SH*T TO YOU......

YOU GET IT FROM SOMEONE ELSE.

If I went back to that, it would only be the same sh*t... 
TO TRY TO AFFECT ME.

I see that sh*t. Very easily. I don't respect it. 

OF COURSE I WAS GOING TO RECOVER, THE FIRST TIME.

DUDES THINK THAT BREAKING MY HEART
WILL "RUIN" ME.

YOU KNOW HOW MUCH SH*T I HAD TO RECOVER FROM?

A LOT OF SH*T.

I've recovered from a lot more than a "broken heart."

MORE THAN THAT BS... 

But look! I overcame that, too!