Miffed

Well, I have had a so-called friend for over 10 years, 
Probably closer to 14 years... 

Met him online. 
We hung out before. 
I've slept at his place before. 

But... I'm so miffed at this guy...

So many fkn times he's been shitty to me.

A bunch of sh*t has really been grinding on my gears.
ABOUT HOW HE TREATED ME.
AND THINKS IT IS OKAY.
IT'S NOT.

I told him that I realized he treats me differently
THAN OTHER PEOPLE. 
I HAVE SEEN THAT.

HE DENIES IT.
EVERYTHING SH*TTY HE'S DONE
OR SAID TO ME.... 

It's been building up.... For a while. 

One time, he invited me to a party
of his friends and got invited to another party.
So he said he would meet me at the party
I was supposed to meet him at.
BUT DID HE SHOW UP?
I LEFT AND WENT HOME.

After that... He got a guitar.
HE WOULDN'T LET ME EVEN TOUCH IT...
BUT... HE TOOK PICTURES
OF SOME GIRL PLAYING IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BUT I COULDN'T TOUCH IT.

THERE AREN'T ANY PICTURES OF HIM AND I.
TOGETHER AS FRIENDS.

BUT MOST OF MY FRIENDS ARE LIKE THIS...
AND CAN TAKE PICTURES WITH EVERYONE ELSE!

One time, I was waiting for him at his place.
I don't have the password for his main computer.
That he would have let me use, 
and he wasn't home to ask him...
He had another computer open...
I DID NOT TOUCH ANY OF HIS WORK CRAP.
BUT HE... DIDN'T "YELL" AT ME ABOUT IT
BUT WASN'T HAPPY...
AND HIS FRIEND WAS WITH HIM
WHEN HE GOT BACK
AND WAS LIKE ALMOST BERATING ME ABOUT IT
IN FRONT OF HIM.

DID I NEED THAT CRAP?

THE LATEST THING.... I WROTE SOMETHING
ABOUT GROUP MENTALITY...
HE WAS USING AN EXAMPLE I USED
AS AN EXCUSE TO ARGUE WITH ME
LIKE HE ALWAYS DOES...
HE PICKS ONE THING....
THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH
MY MAIN POINTS.............
AND ARGUES WITH ME ABOUT IT.

HE CANNOT HAVE A CONVERSATION. 

ANYWAY, IT BUGGED ME THAT HE WASN'T LISTENING, AGAIN!
HE NEVER DOES!

I CALLED HIM ON IT. HE UNFRIENDED ME....
DIDN'T KNOW HE DID IT....
THEN SENT ME A NEW FRIEND REQUEST!

I SHOULD HAVE REFUSED IT!

WEREN'T YOU MY FRIEND UNTIL
YOU UNFRIENDED ME?

But I accepted it... BUT I DON'T WANT TO TALK 
WITH THIS GUY ANYMORE. 
I HAVE NOTHING TO TALK TO HIM ABOUT.
WHAT'S THERE TO TALK ABOUT?
HE CAN TALK TO HIS GIRLFRIEND. 
AND ALL HIS FRIENDS.

I'd rather HAVE REAL FRIENDS
WHO LISTEN TO ME.
AND TREAT ME LIKE THEY APPRECIATE ME. 

Anyway, I'm very disappointed WITH MOST PEOPLE I KNOW.

I DON'T LIKE HAVING MY TIME WASTED!
BY ANYONE.

So I just... DON'T REALLY CARE ANYMORE.

MIFFED ME TO THE POINT
OF NOT CARING ANYMORE.

SHOULD HAVE CARED WHEN I DID...
BECAUSE NOW I DON'T. 

I feel like walking away FROM EVERYONE
WHO TOOK ME FOR GRANTED, EVER.

I'm not going to be AROUND FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!
PEOPLE WHO TAKE ME FOR GRANTED
TREAT ME LIKE I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO
THAN WAIT TO JUST BE TREATED
THE WAY THEY TREAT EVERYONE ELSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHY SHOULD I?????????????

WOULD THEY WANT ME TO TREAT THEM LIKE THAT?
NO? THEN WHY TREAT ME LIKE THAT?

I shouldn't have accepted his "friend" request.
HE'S NOT A REAL FRIEND!

Irony

Been writing like bananas... I'll pop in from time to time... 
Not a lot to "vent" about right now... 

Been very tired lately...
Maybe burning myself out... 

I have a funny story, though....
I... THOUGHT I lost my keys... 
They were in a pocket I don't typically use.

Anyway, I was outside for a bit. Not gone far... 
When I got home, my keys were not in my regular pockets.
So I thought I lost them. I didn't, but I thought I did.

So then... I got security to come and let me into my apartment.
AND they came by to change my lock on my door.

AND right after the LOCK DUDE LEFT....
I FOUND MY FREAKING KEYS!
IRONY!

FUNNY!

Now I have to pay for a lock change I didn't need lol.
Oh well. 

At least I didn't actually lose them.

Sometimes I Really Wonder

Sometimes, I really wonder if some people WOULD understand me
IF THEY THOUGHT ABOUT WHAT I SAID. 

AND WHY I SAY THE THINGS THAT I SAY.
WHETHER I'M UPSET ABOUT SOMETHING, 
WHETHER I'M FRUSTRATED, 
WHETHER I JUST WISH TO BE FKN UNDERSTOOD... 

Do I expect everyone to understand all the time? No. 
Am I okay with the fact that they don't get what I'm saying or why? Yeah. 
Do I wish they thought about what I was saying and why? Yes.
But wishing that they would doesn't make them think or understand. 

That's why I even wonder if there is a point in making a point
if most people don't fkn listen, don't understand, don't think... 

Is it FAIR that the LGBTQ community gets funds for parades
AND CAN FINE A TOWN FOR NOT WANTING A GAY PARADE?

While, for years, reserves have DIRTY WATER THEY HAVE TO BOIL. 

If someone else's sexual preferences should only matter to THEM, 
NOT BE FORCED TO MATTER TO EVERYONE... 

WHEN APPARENTLY CLEAN WATER ONLY MATTERS
IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANY!!!!

That really bothers me, and it should bother people who understand why. 

It doesn't bother me if anyone GETS MAD AT ME
THAT CLEAN WATER MATTERS MORE TO ME THAN A PARADE.

It kind of bothers me when people don't seem to UNDERSTAND WHY.

What Would It Look Like?

I'm not anti-gay or anti-LGBTQ. 

Should it matter to me who someone goes to bed with or as?
Should MY sexual preferences matter to YOU?
Or should my preferences, ALL OF THEM, be personal TO ME?
Should I need a parade about my lifestyle?
Is a parade a basic NEED?

Should the preferences OF ANY GROUP MATTER MORE
THAN THE PREFERENCES OF ANY OTHER GROUP?

SHOULD BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS, LIKE CLEAN WATER
MATTER MORE THAN SOMEONE'S SEXUAL PREFERENCES?

Do you want to know why I'm asking these questions?
Because it wouldn't hurt to think about these things. 

Should a basic human need matter more than a parade?

Because if it should, and it does to me... 
If it should matter MORE THAN A PARADE...
MAYBE SOMETHING SHOULD BE DONE ABOUT IT.

Is that A GOOD ENOUGH REASON FOR ASKING?
JUST ASKING QUESTIONS?

One more question, a REAL question:

If ANY group acts like their rights matter more than OTHER groups' rights...
SHOULD ALL GROUPS ACT LIKE THAT?

If all groups acted like that, maybe there might be some DISCRIMINATION
AND FAVORITISM. 

ONE group's preferences should not matter more than another's. 
ONE group's rights should not matter more than another's. 

If all groups acted the exact same way, what would that look like to you?
Would that look like progress in any way?

What would that look like? If ALL GROUPS ACTED LIKE
THEIR RIGHTS AND PREFERENCES MATTER MORE
THAN THE RIGHTS AND PREFERENCES OF OTHER GROUPS?

NO MATTER WHAT THE GROUPS ARE! 
BECAUSE IT DOESN'T FKN MATTER!
WHAT THE GROUPS ARE ISN'T THE POINT. 

ALL groups!
If EVERY GROUP acted like their rights and preferences matter MORE
than ANY OTHER GROUP....

What would that look like to you?