Getting Myself Together

I really thought I was over all of this sh*t. I really did.
It wasn't bothering me until he showed back up....
INSULTING ME SOME MORE.

If he had approached me BETTER....
MAYBE THE RESULT WOULD BE BETTER.

BUT THE WAY HE DID ALL THAT SH*T....
AND THEN TO FKN TRY TO ACT....
LIKE HE DIDN'T "REMEMBER."
CONVENIENT.

WHEN I HAD TO PUT ALL THAT SH*T BEHIND ME.
WHEN I HAD TO PUT HIM BEHIND ME.

NOT BECAUSE I WANTED TO....
BUT HE ACTED LIKE THAT.

WHETHER HE HAD A FALSE BELIEF ABOUT ME....
HE STILL DID THAT SH*T.

And if I was "toxic" I WOULD HAVE DONE THAT EXACT SH*T.
BUT I DIDN'T. DID I? NO.

SIT ON THAT.

As angry as I was.... I had moved on.
JUST LIVING MY LIFE.

BARELY THINKING ABOUT HIM AT ALL.

DID I THINK ABOUT HIM A FEW TIMES? SURE.

BUT.... I STILL REMEMBER EVERYTHING HE DID.
STILL NOT COOL WITH IT.

AM I SUPPOSED TO BE COOL WITH IT BECAUSE HE "FORGOT"?

I DIDN'T.

WHEN PEOPLE WALK OUT OF MY LIFE...... I LET THEM!

THE ONLY ONE I LET BACK IS MY SON.
THAT'S IT.

EVERYONE ELSE CAN FK OFF.

AND YES, I WILL BE TELLING HIM SOME THINGS....
NOT TO MAKE HIM FEEL LIKE SH*T....
BUT TO ENSURE HE DOESN'T DO THAT SH*T AGAIN.

IT'S NOT COOL. 

IT WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN COOL WITH HIM.
HAD I DONE THAT SH*T.

NOBODY WOULD BE "COOL" WITH THE SH*T....
COMING FROM ME.
OR ANYONE ELSE.

SO WHY WOULD I BE "COOL" WITH THAT SH*T?
I WOULDN'T!
SO EXPECTING ME TO BE "COOL" WITH THAT SH*T....
IS FKD UP.

It wasn't because he "magically cared."
HE ACTED LIKE HE DIDN'T! ALREADY!

ALREADY SHOWED ME THAT SH*T.
THAT'S WHAT I BELIEVE.
WHAT I WAS SHOWN.

NOT WHAT COMES OUT OF SOMEONE'S MOUTH.

A LOT OF PEOPLE TALK OUT OF THEIR @SS.

12 YEARS LATER....
WAS THERE ANYTHING HE COULD SAY TO REBUILD THE BRIDGE
THAT HE INTENTIONALLY BURNED?

WANTED TO SEE HOW BAD HE BURNED IT?

WELL, NOT ONLY DID IT BURN.... TO NOTHING...
TOO MUCH WATER UNDER IT, TOO.

NO BRIDGE THERE. NOTHING TO SEE.
GONE. 12 YEARS AGO.

If I was "toxic" I WOULD HAVE HELD A GRUDGE!
FOR 12 FKN YEARS! DID I?

OR WAS I JUST DISAPPOINTED AF?!

ANGRY BECAUSE IT WAS FKN UNFAIR BS....
UNDERSTANDABLY.... 

BUT MOSTLY DISAPPOINTED!

BECAUSE:

1) I WOULDN'T HAVE DONE HIM LIKE THAT!
2) I WASN'T EXPECTING THAT SH*T!

IF I WAS EXPECTING THAT SH*T FROM HIM....
WOULD I HAVE FKN BOTHERED AT ALL? NO?

But.... Guess what?!
I'M USED TO NOT GETTING WHAT I WANTED!
USED TO BEING FKN DISAPPOINTED!
USED TO PEOPLE BEING WRONG ABOUT ME!
ETC!

THERE ARE THINGS I'M NOT USED TO:
BEING SEEN FOR ME.
BEING RESPECTED.
BEING TREATED FAIRLY.

Like why treat me like I WAS GOING TO FKN RUIN YOUR LIFE!?
DID YOU EVEN KNOW ME?
WHAT I ACTUALLY WANTED WITH YOU?
NOT FROM YOU?

DID WE GET TO TALK ABOUT ANYTHING?

OR WERE YOU TOO BUSY BEING WRONG ABOUT ME
TO FKN TALK TO ME?

Yeah, that gets fkn disappointing. It does.

THAT IS WHY I STOPPED TRYING!
THERE WAS NO POINT!