I'm Tired

I'm really tired of being expected to xyz
just because xyz. 

Kind of like when I offered my brother
that he can stay here if he needs a break. 

Lastnight he was up late, 
and then he snored all night.
Hard to sleep with someone snoring like that.

I have not been getting enough sleep.
I have not been sleeping well. 

He has been, because he can put his bed down. 
Since there's room for him to do that... 

We organized my place, a bit the other day... 
He moved his bed so I don't have to fkn step over him
when I get out of my bed, to use the washroom etc.

That was fkn bugging me. 

And getting woken up. 
Especially if I hardly fkn slept. 

On my birthday I couldn't sleep in, 
because his dog decided to jump on me, 
and wanted to sleep next to me on my bed, 
but there's only enough room for me where I sleep. 
So his dog was on top of me, 
first thing in the morning... 

If it's not my brother snoring, it's his dog, 
or both of them... 

I thought he was only coming over for a few days. 

He doesn't seem to want to leave. 
I don't blame him for not wanting to go over there, 
it's a change for him,

but I can only seem to handle most people for like
three days in a row, max,

After that, I WANT TO BE ALONE!!!!
SO I CAN FKN SLEEP BETTER AT NIGHT.
WHEN I WANT TO!
AND NOT GET WOKEN UP!

The other day I was so fkn irritated with everything. 

What bugged me the most was WHEN I WAS CLEANING, 
MY BROTHER STANDING THERE, 
WATCHING ME. 

NOT HELPING, NOT DOING ANYTHING, 
JUST WATCHING ME. 

I FKN HATE THAT SH*T!!!!!

GO FKN DO SOMETHING!!!!!
DON'T STAND THERE WATCHING ME!!!!!

When I am WORKING, 
DON'T STAND THERE WATCHING ME!!!!

UNLESS YOU ARE MY BOSS
OR SUPERVISOR... 

DO YOUR OWN WORK!!!!!
DO WHATEVER FKN ELSE!!!!
DON'T STAND THERE WATCHING ME WORK!!!!

I got so damn irritated every time he fkn did it. 

My ex did that sh*t to me, AT WORK. 
WHEN WE BOTH WERE SUPPOSED TO BE WORKING!!!!

At first, I didn't know he wasn't doing his work. 

BECAUSE I WAS BUSY DOING MINE.
AND HE WOULD HIDE AND DO WHATEVER.
AND I ASSUMED HE WAS DOING HIS WORK,
LIKE HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DOING... 
WHILE I DID THE WORK
I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DOING. 

So when I was organizing and cleaning, 
my brother stood there, watching me. 

DID I MENTION I FKN HATE THAT SH*T?!
I REALLY FKN DO!

He did eventually clean in the kitchen
while I did organizing in the living room... 

And took his dog outside
while I cleaned the bathroom... 

EVERY TIME I CLEAN MY WASHROOM, 
IT SEEMS THAT I'M NOT THE FIRST TO USE IT. 

IT'S LIKE: "A*** JUST CLEANED THE BATHROOM?!
I'M GOING TO TAKE A SHOWER!"

NO MATTER WHO IS LIVING WITH ME
OR STAYING WITH ME. 

HAPPENS ALMOST EVERY FKN TIME.

I used to call them all bathrooms. 
Even washrooms... 

Supposedly the difference between a bathroom and a washroom, 
is a bathroom's not a bathroom, "officially"...
If you can't bathe in it. 

Like if there is no tub/shower.

THAT is what makes it a washroom or a bathroom. 

Also, public washrooms are washrooms
and the washrooms in people's homes
are usually bathrooms. 

Not that it matters what you call it. 
AS LONG AS YOU PUT THE SEAT UP
AND PUT IT BACK DOWN. 

My ex was bad for that. 
For leaving the seat up. 

Living alone for so long, 
you get used to not FALLING INTO THE TOILET!!!!!
BECAUSE THE SEAT IS ALREADY DOWN!!!!

I SWEAR IF DUDES KNEW HOW THAT WAS, 
THEY PROBABLY MIGHT THINK ABOUT
PUTTING THE SEAT BACK DOWN FFS.

Anyway, to get him to "remember" to do it, 
he owed me a quarter for leaving it up. 

We did it like that
instead of fkn getting mad at him about it
all the time. 

AND I WANTED HIM TO REMEMBER
TO FKN DO IT. 

IF HE WANTED TO DO IT, HE WOULD DO IT. 

ANYWAY, HE WAS USED TO LEAVING IT UP, 
BECAUSE HE LIVED WITH ANOTHER DUDE. 
THEY BOTH JUST LEFT IT UP. 

I get that leaving it up was a habit. 

IF DUDES KNEW WHAT IT WAS LIKE
TO TRY TO SIT ON THE TOILET
WHEN THE FKN SEAT IS UP, 
AND YOU DON'T KNOW IT IS, 
BECAUSE IT'D BE COOL IF IT WAS ALREADY DOWN.... 

LIKE OUT OF CONSIDERATION FOR ME, 
IN MY OWN HOME... 

That's been my brother's big b*tching point
about his ex, recently... 

Said that she kept everything HERS, like the place etc... 
"So she could kick me out."

YES SHE FKN DID.
MOST GIRLS DO THAT. 

WHY? BECAUSE IT WAS HER FKN PLACE.
YOU MOVED IN WITH HER.

IT WASN'T A PLACE THAT YOU GOT TOGETHER.

AND IT IS YOUR FKN JOB
AS THE BOYFRIEND, BRO
TO NOT MAKE HER WANT TO KICK YOU OUT. 

I'm his SISTER and we spent like a week straight together, 
and I NEED A FKN BREAK FROM HIM. 

I was telling him today, 
that he snores so loud that it's hard to sleep... 

BECAUSE SHE SNORES LIKE THAT FFS.

He said, "I could sleep during the day..."

DUDE!!!! I HAVE SH*T TO DO DURING THE FKN DAY!!!!
YOU SHOULD BE DOING SH*T, TOO!

LIKE I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOU SMOKING YOUR BONG
ALL FKN NIGHT
AND HEAR YOU SNORING ALL DAY. 

LIKE GTFO OF HERE, 
FKN DO SOMETHING. 
GO SOMEWHERE.

The only breaks I've been getting
is when he takes his dog for a walk. 

I LOVE MY BROTHER, 
BUT I DON'T WANT HIM IN MY FACE ALL THE TIME.

I DON'T REALLY WANT ANYONE IN MY FACE ALL THE FKN TIME!!!!

DO I EVEN WANT TO BE IN ANYONE'S FACE?
AT ALL LET ALONE CONSTANTLY?

EVEN IF I'M THEIR SISTER OR XYZ?

NO TF I DO NOT!

BECAUSE I KIND OF LIKE DOING MY OWN THINGS. 

Anyway, my brother went out tonight
and left his dog here for me to watch him
while he's out. 

There was a stabbing tonight, blocks away from here. 
Injuries reported, condition unknown. 

Anyway, I'm tired. Not been getting a lot of sleep lately.