Why Do I Bother?

Stressed about moving isn't even the word.

I've got pretty much everything "organized"
and been grouping stuff together that just
"needs to be somewhere else."

Someone gave me 10 boxes.
I've got 12 days left, pretty much.

Yesterday, I brought some stuff over
to my mother's place, for my brother.

On my way over, I stopped by
to give a couple of things to a neighbor's dog.

Someone had smashed his window, 
and smashed his windshield.

He had told me.
"Someone from the neighborhood."
So he was kind of on guard at the door.
Until I explained why I was there.
Handed it to him through his broken window.

I told my Step-father I'd stopped by there
and someone had busted his window
and his windshield. 

My step-father told me that he could have been
targeted for screwing someone over.

And supposedly my step-father saw the guy
"in action" how "he is" etc.
Told me to stay away from the guy.

Last thing I want IS ANY KIND OF A RELATIONSHIP.
WITH THAT GUY OR ANYONE.

I had a football and decided to give it to the guy's dog.
A couple of volleyballs I found will go to
a couple of other dogs I "know."

That's about it. 

I've already learned that
JUST BECAUSE YOU
TRUST SOMEONE NOT TO XYZ,
IT DOESN'T MEAN THEY WON'T XYZ.

At least you can trust yourself NOT TO XYZ.

Just bothers me being accused of bs
and then try to gaslight me about something
THAT I KNOW FOR A FACT I DIDN'T DO?

That's infuriating. 
It's insulting.

Anyone else would feel infuriated and insulted.
They would, too.

Anyway, probably some story
behind why the broken window etc,
BUT NOT MY BUSINESS.

But what was I going to say?
"....That's sh*tty."

Did what I went there to do.
To deliver a dog a football lol. 

But yeah, hard not to notice a broken window.
He'd had his windshield fixed at that point.

As long as I'm down a football, I'm good.

I had to go through my rock collection, 
pared it down, pretty well, I think.

I've got 12 days to go through my boxes, 
and pare the boxes down, even more.

"10 Things."

Ever watch that show called "Alone"?
Where the people are "alone" in the wilderness
and they are trying to out-survive each other.

Whoever lasts the longest, wins.

They did Vancouver Island, pretty sure, 
and they did Patagonia.

They were allowed to tap out
at any time. Their choice.

But they were only allowed to bring 10 things.

What 10 things would you bring, with you, 
IF you could only take 10 things?

That's pretty much what I have to do with these boxes.
What 10 things from each box?

10 things, 10 boxes... 100 things.
Do people need 100 things?

*Moving across the desert with camels*
"Wait up! What about my 236653425668798867655332 Things?"

*Camels snorting, unimpressed*

Camels spit, too. 

Just looking at my "things" 
I know that I don't need everything. 

Still very hard to let things go, though.

The hardest things are the things that I collect, books.

But, pretty much all my things are kinda "baggage."

In some ways, I guess.

We're allowed to "travel" lighter.
And we don't have to carry other people's stuff. 
With us from this life time, to the next.

Mirror smasher LITERALLY THREATENED
TO SEND 2 GIRLS TO MY DOOR LOL.

ALL BECAUSE I TOLD HIM
TO TELL ME
TIME AND DATE ONLY
ABOUT PICKING UP HIS STUFF.

And he literally couldn't have a conversation about it.

So I just told him I'll toss it then. 

He wanted me to send him Pictures of it!!!!!
So he could decide if HE EVEN WANTED TO COME GET IT.

Am I going to waste my time?
Taking pictures to send to him
OF HIS STUFF?

FOR HIM TO DECIDE IF HE WANTS?

Just f*cking take it and
WHY make it a f*cking hassle?
To even TALK ABOUT IT?

DATE AND TIME.
THAT'S IT.

BUT I'M FISHY 
BECAUSE NO, I'M NOT GOING TO
TAKE PICTURES OF YOUR STUFF 
TO SEND TO YOU
SO YOU CAN DECIDE FFS.

"I HAVE YOUR THINGS.
COME GET THEM, IF YOU WANT THEM.
IF NOT, I'LL TOSS IT."

I'm FISHY
BECAUSE HE WANTS TO MAKE
GIVING HIS THINGS BACK TO HIM
A FKN HASSLE.
FOR NO OTHER REASON.

TO MAKE IT SEEM LIKE
I'M "CRAZY" FOR TRYING TO GIVE HIS THINGS BACK TO HIM. 

THINGS HE COULD HAVE TAKEN OUT OF HERE
HIMSELF, RIGHT AFTER I KICKED HIM OUT

AND WANTED ME TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR.

And supposedly I "took his stuff."
"You took my stuff,"
"Been trying to get you to get it."

Like I'm "suspicious" because he has stuff here.

And I tried to make it super easy for him to understand
but he seems to not have understood. 

Trying to give him back his things
EVEN TALK ABOUT HIM
PICKING UP HIS OWN THINGS
LIKE A FKN RESPONSIBLE ADULT.

IS A HUGE FKN THING
IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE
AND I TOLD HIM 
PHONE CALL ONLY
ABOUT TIME AND DATE ONLY
AND WHAT DOES HE DO?
HE THREATENS TO HAVE 2 GIRLS COME TO MY DOOR LOL.

BECAUSE I SAID I DON'T OWE HIM PHOTOS
OF HIS STUFF FOR HIM TO DECIDE ABOUT IT.

EITHER COME GET IT OR F*CK OFF.

WHO IS HE TO FKN ASK ME OF PHOTOS
OF HIS STUFF FFS?

ANYONE TO ME?
TO ASK ME ANYTHING?
LET ALONE PICTURES OF THEIR STUFF?
FOR THEM TO DECIDE?

WTF?

No. You don't get to DISRESPECT ME
THEN THINK YOU GET TO 
ASK ME FOR ANYTHING
LET ALONE PICTURES OF YOUR STUFF
FOR YOU TO DECIDE ABOUT.

AND THREATEN ME? 
GLAD I HAVE A RECORD OF THAT MESSAGE.

COULD HAVE HAD A CONVERSATION, INSTEAD.

BUT THIS IS THE KIND OF INTELLECT.

THAT DOESN'T UNDERSTAND:
TIME AND DATE ONLY.

You think threatening me is a way to "negotiate" with me?
Running my mouth about what?
Saying the SAME SH*T YOU SAY TO ME?
ONLY SEEM TO UNDERSTAND THAT, 

NOT: "TIME AND DATE ONLY."

Now he f*cked himself of the chance he had
TO JUST COME GET HIS STUFF.

THAT HE SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN TF 
OUTTA HERE A LONG @SS TIME AGO.

SO I COULD MOVE ON. FULLY.
LIKE I HAVE A RIGHT TO DO.

BUT I THOUGHT, MAYBE I SHOULD TRY
JUST ONCE MORE
TO GIVE HIM BACK HIS THINGS

AND HE ACTS LIKE HE THINKS
HE CAN ASK ME FOR PICTURES OF IT?

ALL BECAUSE I SAID TIME AND DATE ONLY.
NO BACK AND FORTH BS 
AND HE PROCEEDED WITH THE BS.

BECAUSE HE DIDN'T GET ME TO COMPLY
WITH WHAT HE WANTED.

AM I SUPPOSED TO GIVE A FUQ IF HE WANTS IT?
IF NOT, JUST SAY THAT AND NOT BE A D*CK?

Either you want it, or don't. 

Don't DEMAND PICTURES OF IT.
DON'T DEMAND FUQ ALL FROM ME.
HIS DAYS OF ASKING ME
FOR ANYTHING ARE OVER.

Why is my stuff still there?

BECAUSE WHEN YOU SHOULD HAVE
JUST COME TO GET IT THE FIRST TIME
YOU MADE IT A HUGE FKN HASSLE

AND "LOST" STUFF TO "BLAME ME"
FOR TAKING. ETC.

"She wouldn't take pictures of it for me."
DO I OWE YOU WHAT YOU WANT
FROM ME?

WHAT ABOUT WHAT I WANTED
FROM YOU?

AS EASY AS:
PHONE CALL ONLY
DATE AND TIME ONLY.

Just that f*cking EASY.
INSTEAD OF A DAMN HASSLE.

2 Girls to pick it up for me...

NO, JUST PICK UP YOUR OWN STUFF
LIKE A BIG BOY
THAT YOU'RE TRYING VERY HARD
TO MAKE YOURSELF 
LOOK LIKE.

Why make that SO DAMN HARD?
DATE AND TIME
TO PICK UP YOUR STUFF.
ONLY.
NOTHING ELSE.

Want to have a conversation about what's here,
THEN ASK ME.

DON'T ASK ME FOR PICTURES
OF YOUR STUFF ETC.

"I'M NOT WASTING MY TIME
COMING TO GET IT IF IT'S GARBAGE
OR NOT MINE." FFS.

Why would I waste MY OWN DAMN TIME?

GIVING HIM YET ANOTHER CHANCE
TO GET HIS STUFF?


THEN HE WANTS PICTURES OF IT?
I literally had to TAKE A PICTURE
OF A CHAT
THAT SOME GIRL WAS 
SUPPOSEDLY LOOKING FOR HIM
CONTACTED ME.

OR I WAS JUST "CRAZY"
AND MAKING SH*T UP ETC.

Is it because IT DOESN"T BELONG TO ME?
Is it because IT BELONGS WITH HIM?

LIKE JUST DO IT, OR DON'T
IT'S  NONE OF MY CONCERN NOW.

Just have a CONVERSATION ABOUT IT, THOUGH.
HOW hard is that to do. 

*Phone call*

"What do you have of mine?"
"I have xyz."
"Okay, I don't want xyz."
"Okay, all good."

NOT A BUNCH OF BS EMAILS
ABOUT MAKING IT A HASSLE
JUST TO FKN GET YOUR THINGS.
JUST THAT.

DATE AND TIME ONLY.
AS SIMPLE AS THAT.

NOTHING ELSE.

NO "SEND ME PICTURES SO I CAN DECIDE."
NO "Are you f*cking crazy? I asked for a picture."

Like I owe him a picture because he wants it?

I'll get right on that, dude.

It's sitting there

WHILE I HAVE OTHER THINGS TO DO
OTHER THAN ENTERTAIN YOUR BS.

AND if you don't want it, I'll toss it.
AND AFTER THAT

THERE'S NO WISHING
WE WOULD HAVE JUST 
HAD THOSE CONVERSATIONS.

Stupid? Because I won't do SOMETHING FOR YOU?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING FOR YOURSELF?

ANY FAVORS
BY CALLING SOMEONE
WHO HAS YOUR STUFF

FKN STUPID?

BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T OWE YOU
PICTURES OF YOUR STUFF.

OR ANYTHING ELSE.

JUST COULD HAVE MADE IT AS EASY AS
TIME AND DATE.

THAT'S ALL.

why MAKE EVERYTHING
SO DAMN HARD FOR ME?
EVEN HAVING A CONVERSATION
ABOUT GIVING YOUR THINGS BACK
HAS TO BE A FKN HUGE HASSLE

WHEN YOU'D THINK
HE'D WANT HIS THINGS BACK
AND JUST GIVE ME
THE TIME AND DATE THE HE WAS COMING
TO GET HIS STUFF. 

BECAUSE I AM FKN BUSY.
I DON'T HAVE MY TIME TO WASTE
WAITING AROUND FOR HIM
TO DECIDE IF HE WANTS IT.

Like one guy who gave me the gazebo frame.
I asked him if he wanted to have it back

and when I called him 
to make plans for him to get it

he told me to toss it
because he just couldn't be bothered
to make plans with me
to get it

AND I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE SH*T
TO THE LAST MINUTE

BUT NOW I STILL HAVE THIS THING
TO DEAL WITH ON TOP OF EVERYTHING ELSE.

HE DOESN'T REALIZE
THAT HE'S HAD HELP
TO DO LOTS OF THINGS
AND WHEN I POINTED OUT
THAT I DON'T HAVE HELP
TO DO FK ALL

HE WAS LIKE:
"WELL, IT IS WHAT IT IS.
NO SENSE COMPLAINING ABOUT IT."

No, I'm pointing out something. 

COMPLAINING ABOUT IT
IS DIFFERENT
THAN POINTING SOMETHING OUT.

I was POINTING OUT
THAT HE HAD HELP TO MOVE.

IF I HADN'T STARTED PACKING
WHEN I HAD, I'D BE FKD. 

DO I HAVE ANYONE HELPING ME?

SH*THEAD CAN'T EVEN HELP ME
BY NOT WASTING MY TIME FFS.

threats, insults, bs.
ALL I ASKED FOR
WAS DATE AND TIME.

THAT'S ALL.

DON'T GET TO ASK ME FOR FUQ ALL.
EVER AGAIN.

NOT EVEN TO TAKE PICTURES OF YOUR STUFF...!!!
DA FUQ?

AND WHEN I DON'T? 2 GIRLS ARE COMING OVER?
BECAUSE I OWE YOU FUQ ALL?

AND YOU COULD JUST GET YOUR STUFF YOURSELF.
YOU KNOW, LIKE A BIG STRONG MAN.

INSTEAD OF SENDING GIRLS
TO TRY TO CAT FIGHT ME
OVER A GUY
WHO CAN'T BE MAN ENOUGH

TO JUST PICK UP HIS OWN THINGS
WITHOUT IT BEING ANY KIND
OF FKN ORDEAL.

LIKE HE DID BEFORE, 
THAT'S WHY HIS SH*T'S EVEN STILL HERE FFS.

HE SEEMS CONFUSED ABOUT THAT, TOO. 
ABOUT WHY I KICKED HIM OUT ETC.

BECAUSE NOTHING HAS TO BE
SUCH A HUGE ASS F*CING ORDEAL.

AS SIMPLE AS TIME AND DATE
BECAUSE I SAID I'M MOVING

AND NOT TAKING ANYTHING
THAT'S NOT MINE.

BUT WHY NOT ACCUSE ME OF DOING THAT?
*SARCASM*

ALL BECAUSE
HE WOULDN'T JUST GET HIS STUFF!

You think someone who's
ANTIQUE MIRROR YOU SMASHED
WANTS ANYTHING OF YOURS?

WANTS ANY MEMENTOS?
ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU?

LET ALONE
WANTS TO TAKE PICTURES OF YOUR STUFF
FOR YOU TO MAKE IT EASIER
FOR YOU TO DECIDE
IF IT'S WORTH IT FOR YOU
TO COME GET IT?

He doesn't seem to get that I owe him SH*T.
EVEN THE CHANCE TO COME GET HIS SH*T.

BUT COULD HAVE JUST MADE IT
EASY FOR ME.

JUST TIME AND DATE.

DON'T DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT TO KEEP
WHILE YOU ARE HERE
AND LEAVE SH*T HERE
FOR ME TO DEAL WITH, 

JUST DEAL WITH ALL OF YOUR SH*T.
DON'T EXPECT ME TO DEAL WITH IT FOR YOU.

BECAUSE IT IS YOURS TO DEAL WITH.
THAT'S WHY I WANT YOU TO DEAL WITH IT.

AND YOU COULD JUST DO THAT
INSTEAD OF ACTING LIKE A TW@T
ABOUT IT.

I HAVE ENOUGH OF MINE TO DEAL WITH.
LITERALLY.

LIKE I CARE THAT YOU WANT PICTURES
OF YOUR STUFF FSS.

SHOULD I TELL THE 2 GIRLS
HE'S THREATENED TO SEND TO MY DOOR
TO "COLLECT" FOR HIM
THAT I CARE THAT HE WANTS PICTURES
OF HIS STUFF?

I literally gave him a chance
AND HE FKD UP.

Could have made it easy. 

Said he didn't want it, 
I said, "Good. I'll toss it. Don't contact me again."

He's still sending me emails I'm going to ignore.
BECAUSE HE'S WASTING MY TIME
INSTEAD OF JUST MAKING IT EASY.

Like I owe him "REPLIES" to BS?

But maybe I was "just trying to give you back your fkn stuff."
BECAUSE YOU LEFT IT HERE.
AND I DO NOT WANT IT HERE.

AND IF YOU DON'T WANT IT, 
I WILL TOSS IT.

END OF DISCUSSION. 

But nope, has to proceed with his sh*t. 

WHICH IS WHY I DON'T WANT HIM HERE.
OVERSTAYED HIS WELCOME.

If you make EVERYTHING A HUGE HASSLE
WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT TO
BE AROUND YOU?

BECAUSE IT'S WORTH IT TO YOU
NOT TO MAKE THINGS
A HASSLE FOR CERTAIN PEOPLE?

BUT SOMEHOW
IT'S JUST MAKE EVERYTHING
A HASSLE FOR A***.

Something as easy as 
PHONE CALL ONLY.
TIME AND DATE ONLY.

How simple CAN THAT POSSIBLY BE?

Nope! I WANT TO SEE IT, IF IT IS EVEN MINE ETC.

BUT GETS MAD THAT I DON'T CARE
THAT HE WANTS A PICTURE OF IT
AND I DON'T OWE IT TO HIM
TO JUST DO IT
BECAUSE HE WANTS ME TO.
HE GETS SH*T FROM ME.

JUST LIKE I GET SHIT FROM HIM.
NOT EVEN A CONVERSATION
ABOUT GETTING HIS THINGS FFS.

AND WONDERS WHY
I DON'T WANT ANYTHING MORE TO DO WITH HIM. 

Imagine BREAKING MY ANTIQUE FAMILY HEIRLOOM....
AND THEN DEMANDING THAT I TAKE PICTURES
FOR HIM TO DECIDE
IF HE'S COMING TO GET HIS THINGS!!!!!!!!!

F*CKING OUTRAGEOUS.

Just time and date and can't do that.
Wasted a whole night going back AND FORTH
WITH THIS SH*THEAD.

If he's still trying to message me
he gets f*ck all from me.

No replies, no responses, nothing.

HE HAD A CHANCE
NOT TO BE A D*CK.

ABOUT JUST GETTING HIS THINGS.

AND PROCEEDED
TO BE ONE, ANYWAY.

Shouldn't be a d*ck about getting your things.
When someone who doesn't have to
GIVE YOU THE CHANCE
TO GET YOUR THINGS
GIVES YOU THE CHANCE
TO GET YOUR THINGS

MAYBE SHOULDN'T MAKE THREATS.
About sending girls to my door etc.

you think making threats to me
IS GOING TO MAKE ME
WANT TO TAKE PICTURES OF YOUR STUFF
FOR YOU TO PICK AND CHOOSE?

Let him get "mad" that I'm ignoring him, now.
His threats and immature bs
that I TRIED TO MAKE VERY CLEAR TO HIM
THAT I DO NOT HAVE THE TIME
NOR THE PATIENCE FOR.

That's why I said date and time ONLY.
Tried TO BE TO THE POINT.

WHAT IS HARD TO UNDERSTAND
ABOUT TIME AND DATE ONLY?

Doesn't mean I need to catalog your stuff for you
BEFORE YOU GET HERE
TO PICK IT UP.

Friday @ 5pm. Simple.
Conversation over.

That's all. That's it.

No gaslighting BS.
But literally can't have a conversation,
wants to keep going with the same old sh*t.
And that sh*t's OLD.

It's supposed to "work" on me?
Anything that's not date and time gets "gfy"

I gave up trying to have a conversation with the guy.
He was acting like he didn't want his stuff.
Wanted to give me a hard time, again.

But as soon as I told him NOT TO CONTACT ME AGAIN, 
HE MAGICALLY CAME UP WITH A DAY
HE CAN COME PICK IT UP.

WELL, SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT
BEFORE BEING SO FKD ABOUT
JUST GETTING YOUR SH*T.
BECAUSE I HAVE NEITHER THE TIME, 
PATIENCE, OR DESIRE TO DEAL WITH IT.

TO THE POINT
I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANYTHING ELSE.

NOT EVEN IF HE'S GETTING THE POINT
THAT HIS BS ISN'T NECESSARY.

AND NEVER WAS...

SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT.
A LONG TIME AGO.

WHY START THINKING ABOUT IT, NOW?
COULD HAVE, BEFORE.

BEFORE CHOOSING WHAT HE CHOSE.
WHEN I GAVE HIM YET ANOTHER CHANCE
TO CHOOSE VERY DIFFERENTLY
WITH ME.

SHOULD HAVE TREATED IT
LIKE THE FKN COURTESY THAT IT WAS.
ANY COURTESIES LIKE THE COURTESIES THEY WERE.

AND BEEN COURTEOUS TOWARDS ME.

AND WHAT DO I GET INSTEAD?

Dug himself a HOLE. DEEPER THAN BEFORE.
AND I HAVE HIS "THREATS" IN WRITING.
AFTER I TOLD HIM NO BACK AND FORTH BS.
JUST DATE AND TIME ONLY.

I have proof he proceeded to contact me
AFTER I TOLD HIM NOT TO.

But immediately AFTER I TOLD HIM NOT TO
HE DECIDES TO "COOPERATE"?

Pretty sure it's too late to cooperate
WHEN SOMEONE TELLS YOU
NOT TO CONTACT THEM ANYMORE.

NO OFF AND ON BS.
BEEN THROUGH IT
INSTEAD OF JUST SAVING MYSELF THE TIME
THAT I WASTED...
GIVING PEOPLE CHANCES
NOT TO FKN ACT LIKE THAT FFS.

JUST NOT TO DO THAT SH*T.
AND NOT MY FAULT
THAT IT'S ALL THEY KNOW HOW TO DO.

Do yourselves a favor. DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME, 
LIKE I DID. FKN 6 YEARS OF MY LIFE.
FOR NOTHING BUT BS.

Just don't do it to yourself. 
I wish I hadn't. 

Because I COULD HAVE TOLD THAT FKER
TO GO SUCK A BAG OF D*CKS
A LONG TIME AGO
AND LEFT IT AT THAT.

SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO SHOW SOMEONE
WHY THEY CAN'T BE IN YOUR LIFE.
AND WHY CHOOSING WHAT THEY CHOSE
GOT THEM WHERE THEY ARE.
AND WHERE THEY ARE IS WITHOUT YOU.

AND I SHOULD HAVE SHOWN THAT FKR
THE VERY FIRST TIME.

INSTEAD, I WASTED MY TIME
BECAUSE I CARED?

Yes, I did. I cared. I tried. 
For a broken mirror and a thermos of p*ss. 

AND A HUGE HASSLE
ABOUT GETTING HIS THINGS.

AFTER HE DOESN'T HAVE A RIGHT
TO FK ME AROUND ABOUT ANYTHING.

NOT AFTER SHOWING ME OVER AND OVER
WHY IT'S A WASTE OF MY FKN TIME
DOING ANYTHING FOR HIM. 

EVEN THE FKN COURTESY
OF ALLOWING HIM 
TO COME GET HIS THINGS.

Wasted A WHOLE NIGHT
BECAUSE HE LOVES HIS BACK AND FORTH DRAMA
AND EVERYTHING HAS TO BE
SO MUCH HARDER THAN IT HAS TO BE
WITH HIM
THAT I DON'T WANT ANYTHING 
TO DO WITH THE GUY.

But changes his tune after I say:
Don't contact me again. 

Nothing that he says after I said
DON'T CONTACT ME AGAIN
IS WORTH REPLYING TO.

HE HAD HIS CHANCES, 
HIS OPPORTUNITIES...

WASTED THEM 
AND CLAIMED IT WAS MY FAULT.

Literally slammed the door
in his own face.

THEN WANTS TO BE MAD AT ME
BECAUSE HE KEEPS CHOOSING THAT?
TO DO THAT?

WAS HIS FKN CHOICE.

NOW THAT CHOICE IS GONE.
BECAUSE HE WANTED TO ACT LIKE THAT
WHEN I GAVE HIM THE CHOICE.
THE CHOICE NOT TO ACT LIKE THAT.

AND HAVE A FKN CONVERSATION. 

THAT'S ALL IT TOOK.

BUT BECAUSE IT'S SUCH A FKN HASSLE
TO HAVE A CONVERSATION, 
I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO THE GUY.

Not about ANYTHING.

And if he comes by, 
looking for his things
THAT HE MADE IT A HASSLE
TO TALK ABOUT COMING TO GET

I DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER THE PHONE
AND I DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER THE DOOR.

OR ANY MESSAGES
AFTER:
DON'T CONTACT ME AGAIN.

Maybe he shouldn't have made it a huge hassle for me.

What's simpler than time and date only?
What part of that is hard to understand?
THE ONLY PART?

Did only lose its meaning after OnlyFans?
Did it just became "another word"
WITH NO MEANING?

Now it's my time to ignore him like he did to me.
BECAUSE IF HE WASN'T BUSY
MAKING IT A HUGE HASSLE
TO "COLLECT HIS THINGS"
"HIS THINGS" WOULDN'T STILL BE HERE.

and then TRYING TO ACT LIKE HE WASN'T DOING THAT
TO GASLIGHT ME TO THE FACT HE WAS DOING IT.

Is he going to TRY TO TAKE BACK THE THREATS
HE PUT INTO WRITING?

TO TRY TO 'SAVE' HIS REPUTATION?

Why should I protect it?

If he wanted a stellar reputation
MAYBE HE SHOULD RETHINK
ACTING LIKE THAT.

He literally got too comfortable with me
AS TO THINK I'D CONTINUE
TO PUT UP WITH THAT SH*T.

After I saw that he replied after I told him
not to contact me anymore, I've been ignoring him. 

He better not "show up" on Friday.
And if he sends anyone to my door
HE'S GOING TO WISH HE HADN'T.

If I can incapacitate him, and I can, 
and he knows that I can...

I'd be very light about those "threats."

Should I threaten to send 2 guys TO HIS DOOR?
FOR HIM TO GET THE MESSAGE
THAT IT'S NOT "COOL"
TO TALK TO ME LIKE THAT?

MAYBE THAT'S THE ONLY LANGUAGE HE SPEAKS
IS BULLSH*TLISH.

Been hearing my 'ding' thing for my emails
going off but have been busy.

Been getting some things done, each day.
Took a trip to donate some stuff. 
Would be easier if I had a car
to just load up and unload. 

But having some empty bins around is good
so I can just "decide" by putting it in a bin.
And when that bin gets full, 
it's time to do something with it.

It is partly due to feeling guilty about throwing stuff out.
And sometimes I felt like I needed to keep stuff, 
just in case.

Just that I've kept too much stuff. 
I'm not a case for "Hoarders" the show, 
but if I kept going that way, I dunno.

I'm trying to remind myself
that it's okay to travel light.

It's okay to just not take stuff with me.

And could I, anyway? In a crunch?
Even if I really wanted to?

As materialistic as mirror smasher is, 
you'd think he'd just
have gotten and taken all his stuff HIMSELF.

AND LET ME JUST MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE
LIKE I HAVE A RIGHT TO DO.

BUT WHY NOT BLAME ME FOR SH*T
INSTEAD OF JUST LETTING ME
WALK TF AWAY?

AND THEN WHEN I HAVE A MOMENT
OF PITY FOR THE GUY

AND WANT HIM TO JUST TAKE THE REST
OF HIS THINGS 

HE SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT HERE,

LET ALONE GIVEN ME A HARD TIME
ABOUT LEAVING HERE...

HE ACTS LIKE A TW@T SOME MORE.

Shouldn't have acted like a tw@t, then.
What more can I say about that?

If he wasn't too busy acting like a tw@t, 
we COULD HAVE HAD A CONVERSATION
ABOUT GETTING HIS THINGS, ONLY.

He had to push me to the point
that I don't want to talk to him anymore, 
ABOUT ANYTHING
AND I DON'T CARE WHAT HE WANTS, ANYMORE.

DID HE EVER CARE ABOUT WHAT I WANTED?
WHAT DID I EVEN WANT?


NOT TO BE GIVEN A HARD TIME, 
ANY BS WHATSOEVER
ABOUT GETTING YOUR THINGS
AND F*CKING RIGHT OFF?

JUST THAT? WOW! SO MUCH TO WANT!

NOT TO HAVE YOUR LITTLE FLYING MONKEYS
IN MY BUSINESS?

TO HAVE OPEN CONVERSATIONS
WITHOUT ANY BS?

TO HAVE SOME COOPERATION?

THE VERY LEAST ISN'T DOING IT
AND LESS THAN THE VERY LEAST
ISN'T DOING IT.

You ever wasted so much of your own time
that you are mad at yourself for even wasting it?

That's how I feel about the last 10 years.
I wasted to much time of MY LIFE
on BS.

AND I WAS EXPECTED TO.
SURPRISE! I DON'T HAVE TO!!!!

NOT EVEN WHEN I'M EXPECTED TO!

I GUESS PEOPLE SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT IT.
HOW THEIR BS WOULD BE
COMING FROM ME.

THEY CAN'T SEE HOW IT IS, 
I GUESS UNTIL I START ACTING LIKE THEM.

AND I DON'T EVEN WANT TO ACT LIKE THEM. 

BUT I HAVE TO PUT MY FOOT DOWN.
AND NOT ACCEPT OR TOLERATE
BEING SPOKEN TO LIKE THAT.

WHEN HE NEVER HAD TO MAKE IT AN ISSUE.

HE DOESN'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND
THAT MAKING SOMETHING
THAT NEVER HAD TO BE AN ISSUE
INTO AN ISSUE
IS THE ISSUE.

THAT I HAVE AN ISSUE WITH.

That goes FOR ALL DUDES.
NOT JUST HIM. 

AND I WON'T DATE OR BE AROUND
ANYONE WHO HAS AN ISSUE WITH THAT.


WITH MAKING EVERY DAMN THING
INTO AN ISSUE WHEN IT NEVER HAD TO BE ONE.

AND TRYING TO GASLIGHT ME ABOUT IT.
LIKE "NO I WASN'T"


JUST FKN ADMIT THAT YOU WERE!
CAN'T EVEN DO THAT!!!

"NO I WASN'T."

*ALL ABOUT BS* "NO I WASN'T."
*LASHES OUT* CAN'T UNDERSTAND F*CK OFF.

Does lashing out at me "make me do what you want me to"?
Or does it make me tell you to go f*ck off?

I am not obligated to do f*ck all for the guy.
I told him that if he's coming over to get his stuff, 
HE'S TAKING IT ALL WITH HIM
WHETHER HE WANTS TO OR NOT.
LEAVING NOTHING HERE.


BECAUE THAT'S NOT MY JOB, IT'S HIS JOB.

"I DON'T WANT THIS." DGAF JUST TAKE IT.

AND IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE "POLITE" ABOUT IT
WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE TO BE POLITE ABOUT IT
WELL TOO BAD.

PROBABLY SHOULDN'T HAVE THREATENED
TO CAUSE "BODILY HARM" "IN WRITING", RIGHT?

I CALL THE SHOTS, NOW. BECAUSE I DO NOT GAF.
YOU DON'T GET TO SPEAK TO ME HOWEVER YOU WANT
EXPECT ME NOT TO DO THE SAME BACK TO YOU

AND I STILL DON'T OWE THE GUY F*CK ALL.
STILL GAVE HIM THE CHANCE TO GET HIS STUFF
AFTER BEING A COMPLETE TW@T TO ME.
AND PROCEEDS TO BE AN EVEN BIGGER TW@T TO ME.

ABOUT JUST GETTING HIS SH*T. ALL OF IT.
LIKE I HAVE THE TIME TO DEAL WITH
WHAT HE DOESN'T WANT?

Reminded him that him and his things
were no longer welcome here when I kicked him out
AND HE'LL TRY TO ACT LIKE I DID IT FOR NO REASON.

LIKE I HAD NO REASON TO WANT TO.

WHY WOULD I WANT TO?

HAD A RIGHT TO. 

REGARDLESS HOW HE FELT ABOUT IT
AND MAYBE HE SHOULDN'T HAVE PUSHED ME TO IT.

AND SHOULDN'T HAVE PUSHED ME TO JUST DUMPING HIS STUFF.
TELLING HIM TO JUST GO F*CK OFF.
YET HE STILL WON'T JUST DO THAT.

How is telling you to GET YOUR SHIT OUT OF MY HOUSE
A GAME ABOUT GETTING YOUR STUFF?

THAT'S LITERALLY WHAT HE THINKS THIS IS, A GAME.

EITHER YOU WANT IT, OR DON'T. 
BUT DON'T INSULT ME, ETC.

HE'S MAD AT ME FOR "PLAYING GAMES
ABOUT GETTING HIS STUFF"

WHEN I MADE IT SIMPLE:
TIME AND DAY ONLY. THAT'S IT.
AND DICKED ME AROUND UNTIL HE GAVE ME AN ANSWER.

THEN AS SOON AS I SAID IF YOU'RE COMING TO GET IT, 
TAKE ALL OF IT. NOT JUST WHAT YOU WANT TO KEEP ETC.
THAT'S YOUR JOB, NOT MINE.

AND TOLD HIM I WANT NOTHING MORE
TO DO WITH HIM. 

AND GOES INTO ANOTHER RAMPAGE.

BECAUSE I TOLD HIM I'M JUST TOSSING IT, NOW
AND HE CAN F*CK OFF. 

WHY DEAL WITH THAT SH*T?

IT'S HIS OWN FAULT IT'S STILL EVEN HERE.
he wanted to blame me for his stuff still being here ffs!

HE COULD HAVE TAKEN IT
AND LET ME MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE
WITHOUT HIS BS.

THAT'S LITERALLY ALL HE HAD TO DO.
INSTEAD, MADE THAT AN ISSUE.

Like what does he think I'm gonna do?
TALK TO HIM AS A FRIEND?
WHEN I'M NO LONGER A FRIEND?

GEE, WHY IS THAT?
WHY DO I NOT WANT TO BE FRIENDS ANYMORE?
WHY DON'T I WANT TO BE AQUAINTED ANYMORE?

WHY DID I TELL HIM TO F*CK OFF?

MUST HAVE BEEN A REASON.

MAD AT ME BECAUSE I ASKED YOU TO GET YOUR SH*T?
ALL OF IT BECAUSE IT'S NOT MY JOB TO SORT IT
BY WHAT YOU WANT TO KEEP ETC?

MAD THAT I WANT YOU TO COME GET IT AT ALL?

mad at me for being mad at you? Too bad.
I'm 100% in the right to be mad, dude.
YOU KNOW WHY.

DON'T BE MAD AT ME, BE MAD AT YOURSELF
THAT YOU AND YOUR THINGS
AREN'T WELCOME WHERE YOU AND THEY ONCE WERE. 

Must have been a reason for that.

BECAUSE APPARANTLY CAN'T SEE SH*T.

"NO I WASN'T."

"SEE YOU'RE STUPID AS HELL, THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE."

What about F*ck off doesn't make any sense?

Guess it makes sense to just insult people
THEY CAN'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND.

And then gets mad at me
FOR "PLAYING GAMES"

When I'm not the one saying:
"SEE YOU'RE STUPID AS HELL,
THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE."

But everyone is "playing games."
BUT NOT HIM.

F*ck off, from now on, is not a game.
It's just f*ck off.