On A Harley

A couple nights ago, I was walking home from a friend's house. 
I noticed a guy while I was walking. 
He was on the other side of the street. 
Something made me want to talk to him. 
But he was getting too far away
and I'd look like a stalker...
So I was going to get a coffee, 
but the doors were closed and locked
and I couldn't go through the drive thru without a car. 

I noticed a chick on a motorcycle in the parking lot. 
We ended up talking. 
She was looking for her hearing aid that fell out
when she was taking her mask off. 
I helped her find it and she took her bike through to get me a coffee. 
Then she was saying she was thinking of getting a room
at the motel across the street. 
I don't usually invite strangers back to my place, 
and it was late.... But I did, anyway. 
We sat up all night talking, and she was smoking. 
And she gave me a ride on her Harley. 

Was the first and only time I've ever been on a motorcycle. 
so surreal.... A lot has.... 

That time I randomly invited a biker chick to spend the night with me....
And got to ride a on a Harley....

And meeting this new friend at the Beach. 
We have some similarities and differences.
A lot of differences are apparent to me.
As are similarities. 

Been thinking that I'll continue to downsize my place.
Took a couple trips to the donation centre already and there'll be more.

It's been hard.... Lately. 
Being separated from my son. 
And all the anxiety coming from everything.
That lead to the separation in the first place.
And a friend said I should be angry.
Because of the way I've been treated. 
Among everything else. 

And the guilt has been eating at me most nights. 
Can't even sleep most nights. 
I stayed up all night with the biker lady. 
She seems pretty cool though.

And the next night I couldn't sleep well. 
The sleeping medication does not allow me to be very functional the next day. 
So I avoid taking it unless I really need to. 

In the hospital, they want to make sure they knock out the patients
so they don't have to do extra work during the night shift. 
Which makes sense, 
but it always feels like an "us vs them" thing in the hospital
between staff and patients
instead of treating them like people, y'know?

I think people would likely get more out of being in the hospital
if people treated people like people
instead of judging them for why they are there.... 

My friend M*tch told me about how the nurses were so cold to him
because they thought he was there because he tried to O.D, 
but his dr gave him a perscription that was too high
so it was an overdose, but not intentional.... 
But they were so cold to him until they found out
that it wasn't intentional, 
but that shouldn't matter.

But anyway, I gotta go for now. 
I'll write more later.