With Or Without Reason

So yesterday was Thanksgiving in Canada.
For whatever reason, I was bombarded with thoughts and feelings
that I didn't want to think and feel.
Last year, right before Thanksgiving, my ex and I had a fight
which resulted in the end of our relationship.
For whatever reason, I kept thinking about stuff like that.
But I couldn't express it to anyone.
Last year, I told my mother that I was sad.
Her response was:
"Today's Thanksgiving. Be sad all you want tomorrow!"
Like people want to be sad...
That response didn't make me feel any better.
But I can't rely on others to 'make' me feel 'better.'
But it'd still be nice if they understood why I feel the way I do.
And say something compassionate at the very least.
Some empathy goes a long way.

So today, I feel a little better than I did yesterday,
but I still feel lower than I'd like to feel.
Maybe hormones or something.

But the other night I was thinking:
How do I get rid of these thoughts?
There's Neuro-Linguistic Programming, (NLP)
Which could be a possible option.
It's been so problematic that I'll try almost anything.

Anyway, today, I want to raise my vibration.
I want to feel better. I want to feel good, but will settle for better.
Sometimes the circumstances affect our moods,
but they don't have to. It can be hard not to let them,
but there are ways to practice not letting them.
I keep thinking "We can't be happy all the time."
But can we?
Despite all the crap going on in our lives?

A year has passed and more will pass
and this will all seem like a blip in history.

So today I just want to feel better,
with no reason to feel better,
just because I can at least try to feel better.
Often we seem to need reasons to feel good,
but do we have to condition our feelings?

Do we need 'reasons' to feel good?
Or can we just think of things that feel good?
The darker the mood, the darker the thoughts.
The lighter the mood, the lighter the thoughts.
But the darker the thoughts, the darker the mood.
The lighter the thoughts, the lighter the mood.

The universe is like the parent that says:
"Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about."
If we didn't already have something to cry about,
we wouldn't be crying in the first place.

But at the same time, it's like:

"When you're happy, you'll have more reasons to be happy."

I remember when I told some people I was happy,
they wanted to know WHY I was happy.
I didn't have any other reason other than just wanting to be happy.

Except it's not always that easy or simple.
Although, it can be.
Also, it can be a reason to be happy.
But to be truly happy, we don't need reasons.
It's just that it can be hard to get there from places we've been.