Suicide at Seven

I've never understood why people kill other people, but I can understand (to some degree) why people kill themselves. There is no reason why a 7 year old should want to kill themselves. Maybe the first time I thought about it I was about 9, but to do it is something else. Kids have so much more of life to live to think about stuff like that. Whether it was accidental or intentional it still should never happen. Abuse is one of the only reasons I could think of that a child would think about that.

It's something that none of us want to think about because it's really sad, but it happens. I can understand an adult thinking about it. But a child?! It's one of those things that we just can't explain. What makes it even more sad is to think about what kind of a life the kid might have had otherwise. He could have grown up to have kids of his own. Or saved someone's life, or something. SOMETHING.

I feel really bad for victims. I've always wanted to have a job where I could help people, make a real difference. Maybe that's why I wanted to be a cop. Of course chances of that happening are nil to never. Despite having a college diploma in policing. One I will be paying for, for the rest of my life. I couldn't be a cop. I don't have the physical, emotional, or mental stamina for that. That kind of job would affect me psychologically because I'd always be fighting for justice, which does not exist. Justice is an ideal that can never be realized. For justice to exist we would have to be a just society and the human race is anything but just to itself, even to other species. Humans are the most dangerous of all species.

Time and time again, we see emotionless killers go through court, and into jail. All the while having and showing no remorse whatsoever. What causes people to detach from emotions? What causes people to act so violently? Some people would say that they are just evil. To become evil, they must have been good at some point in time. I don't believe that people can be born evil because we are all born innocent. What happens to a person that they become so jaded and conflicted with what is right and what is wrong? What makes a person do something when they know that it is wrong? Could it be lack of sympathy or empathy? Could it be both? I don't know. I will never know.