Didn't Ask For His Side

His "side" was moot....
BECAUSE BEFORE HE GAVE HIS EXCUSES.

I ALREADY SAID I WASN'T INTERESTED.

I SAID IT A FEW TIMES.

AND WHAT DID HE DO?
HOW DID HE ACT?

THE SAME AS BEFORE.
SO NO.... HE HADN'T "CHANGED."
NOT EVEN AFTER 12 YEARS.

And yeah... I'll get off this topic eventually.

BUT HE GAVE HIS EXCUSES
LITERALLY IN HIS SECOND MESSAGE.

BECAUSE "PLAYING NICE" WASN'T GOING TO WORK
TO GET THE "REACTION" HE WANTED.

HE WANTED ME TO "REACT"
SO HE COULD SAY: "LOOK AT HOW YOU'RE REACTING!"

NOT: I'M THE REASON YOU'RE REACTING LIKE THAT.

THERE WAS NO "WINNING"
AND THE ONLY THING I COULD DO WAS WALK AWAY
FROM THAT SH*T.

AND THAT WAS "TOXIC."

I WASN'T TRYING TO "WIN"
BUT THERE WAS NO "WIN - WIN" EITHER.

HE DID TAKE ME FOR GRANTED.
HE DID TREAT ME LIKE CRAP.

THAT'S WHY I REJECTED HIS "ATTEMPT"
TO RESTART HIS BS.

AND HAD TO "MAKE A POINT" 
ABOUT "BLOCKING" ME AGAIN....

INSTEAD OF????? JUST BLOCKING ME!

WHEN I CALLED HIM OUT ON HIS DISHONESTY!

BECAUSE IT WASN'T "TO TALK."

BECAUSE HE DIDN'T WANT TO HEAR THE TRUTH...
YET AGAIN.

HE WANTED SOMETHING ELSE.
AND I DON'T HAVE TO GAF ABOUT
WHATEVER TF IT WAS HE WANTED.

IF IT WAS "TO TALK"
HE WOULD HAVE HEARD ME....
AND NOT GIVEN ME EXCUSES
FOR HIS SH*T.

I KNOW HE WAS BEING FKN DISHONEST.
HE WAS BACK THEN....
YEAH... HE WAS WITH HIS EXCUSES, TOO.

SAYING HE COULDN'T TALK TO ME?
I WAS THE ONE WHO COULDN'T TALK TO HIM!
EVER!

SO IT WASN'T "TO TALK."
IT WAS TO "JUSTIFY" HIS SH*T.

TO MAKE HIMSELF FEEL BETTER ABOUT IT.

THAT'S ALL THAT HE WANTED...
UNLESS IT WAS SOMETHING ELSE.

AND IF THAT... I DON'T HAVE TO GAF...
WHAT IT IS.

IF I ASKED FOR HIS BS EXCUSES....
THAT'D BE ONE THING....

BUT I DIDN'T FKN ASK FOR HIS BS EXCUSES....
DIDN'T ASK HIM TO FKN CONTACT ME
AFTER DISCARDING ME...

WHY WOULD I?

I LITERALLY HAD A WHOLE RELATIONSHIP
AFTER HIS BS!

JUST BECAUSE I'M SINGLE NOW....
DOESN'T MEAN I COULDN'T BE DATING....
IF I WANTED TO.

I COULD BE, IF I WANTED TO!

AND HAD I GOTTEN MARRIED?
IN THE 12 YEARS?

BUT HE ASSUMED I'D BE PINING FOR HIM
OR SOMETHING!

WTF?

WELP, I WASN'T.
I WAS LIVING MY LIFE.

Not "expecting" to hear from him again...
NOT EVEN CARING TO!!!!!!!!

THEN? BOOM!?

I SHOULD HAVE TOLD HIM I DON'T WANT TO HEAR HIS SH*T.
IT WAS DONE WHEN HE "ENDED" IT.

12 YEARS AGO.
12 YEARS TOO LATE.

Had things gone BETTER? 
HAD HE TREATED ME BETTER? YEAH?

PROBABLY!

BUT? DID HE?
NO?

SO WHAT CHOICE DID I HAVE?
I LIVED MY LIFE!

I DATED!
LOST INTEREST IN IT!

ISOLATED!
LOST INTEREST IN A LOT OF THINGS!

NOT EVEN BECAUSE OF "DEPRESSION."
WAS IT DEPRESSING? IN SOME WAYS? YEAH?

DRAINING? YEAH?
DEFEATING? YEAH?
DEPOWERING? YEAH?

"LET'S TALK..."
THEN I EXPLAIN WHY I DON'T FKN WANT TO!
AND THEN I AM "TOXIC"
FOR NOT WANTING TO!

BECAUSE EVERY TIME I DID....
HE TREATED ME EXACTLY HOW HE FKN TREATED ME!

OVER AND OVER AND OVER.

AND IF THEY WANT TO GO FK THEMSELVES...
THEY CAN BE MY GUEST!

WOULD YOU TRUST THAT SH*T?
PROBABLY NOT.

DID HE ASK FOR MY SIDE?

"I'M NOT SURE WHAT YOU REMEMBER..."
I TOLD HIM!

MOST OF WHAT I REMEMBER!
AND I'M "TOXIC" FOR REMEMBERING IT!

I REMEMBER IT....
BECAUSE I WAS BEING GASLIT ABOUT IT!

FUNNY HOW THAT WORKS!

WHY BOTHER WITH ME AT ALL?
AFTER 12 YEARS?

COULD HAVE LEFT ME "ALONE"!
RIGHT?

LIKE I LEFT HIM ALONE?

LIKE HE WANTED?

LOSING ME.... MEANS HE'D MISS OUT
ON WHAT I'M BUILDING.

THAT'S ALL HE WAS INTERESTED IN.
WHAT HE MIGHT "GET" IF I WELCOMED HIM BACK.

I LITERALLY HAVE NO FKN REASON TO
OR DESIRE TO.

Why would I after the first round?
And the second round?

Would I want a THIRD?

DID I WANT THE SECOND?

OR???? COULD HE HAVE JUST....
LEFT ME "ALONE"?

TO SEE IF I'LL "CHASE"?
GIVE ME A FKN BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IF I WAS "DESPERATE" OR SOMETHING?

WOULD IT "PROVE" ANYTHING?
OR "CONFIRM" ANYTHING?

RUNNING AWAY TO TRY TO "GET ME" TO "CHASE" HIM?
WTF IS THAT SH*T?

I CALLED HIM ON IT BEFORE HE EVEN DID THAT SH*T!

"LET ME SEE IF SHE'S BLUFFING..."

NO. I REALLY FKN WASN'T.

WAIT ANOTHER 12 YEARS AND SEE FOR YOURSELF! FFS!
WHAT DID I DO? I LIVED MY LIFE WITHOUT HIM!

IF HE DID THAT TO OTHER PEOPLE...
AND THEY "CHASED"....
THAT'S THEM....
NOT ME.

THAT'S FKN GROSS BS, TO ME.
WANTING TO "COMPARE" ME TO
WHOEVER TF "CHASED" HIM
WHEN HE DID THAT SH*T.

I DON'T. I MOVE ON.
BECAUSE I'M "HEALTHY" ENOUGH TO DO THAT.

PLAYING GAMES IS GROSS.

IF I WAS "TOXIC," I'D PLAY THOSE GAMES.
BUT I DON'T.

AND TOO LATE TO FIND THAT OUT.
OH WELL. 

COULD HAVE JUST TREATED ME BETTER....
THAN THAT SH*T....

NOT GOING TO FKN BEG TO BE TREATED BETTER...
OR FOR ANY FKN DECENCY
OR RESPECT. 

FK THAT SH*T.

WAS I? DID I APPROACH HIM?
OR DID HE APPROACH ME?

I WAS MINDING MY OWN FKN BUSINESS THAT DAY.
DOING MY OWN THING.

SHOCKED HE'D HAVE THE "BALLS"
TO TRY THAT SH*T AGAIN.

BUT HE DID! NOT ME.
I wasn't the one trying that sh*t.
HE WAS. NOT ME.

If I was the one trying that sh*t....
I WOULD BE "TOXIC."

IF I HAD TRIED THAT SH*T.

BECAUSE? HE COULD HAVE LEFT ME "ALONE."
SINCE I'M SO "TOXIC." FFS.

YOU'D THINK HE WOULD HAVE!
AND NOT TRIED TO COME BACK....
LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED....
AND IF IT DID.... IT WASN'T "HIS" FAULT.
RIGHT?

FKN GROSS SH*T.

SHOULD HAVE JUST REPLIED: "EWWW. GROSS."
JUST THAT... AND BLOCKED HIM MYSELF.

BUT HE IS BLOCKED ON FB.
BECAUSE I SAW THAT HE'S IN ONE OF THE SAME GROUPS.
AS I'M IN.

SAW ONE OF HIS COMMENTS ON A POST.

SO I BLOCKED HIM.

NOT THAT I'M USING MY FIRST NAME ON THERE.
ANYMORE.

SO CERTAIN PEOPLE LOOKING FOR ME...
WON'T BE ABLE TO FIND ME.
BY SEARCHING MY NAME.

HE FOUND ME ON LINKEDIN, THOUGH!

BECAUSE HE WAS LOOKING FOR ME.

WHY?

TO TELL ME HIS SIDE? 
WHEN I NEVER FKN ASKED FOR IT?

OR HIS EXCUSES?

FK THAT.

IF HE EVER TRIES TO PULL THAT SH*T AGAIN:
"EWWW. GROSS."

NOTHING ELSE.

THAT'S ALL HE WILL GET. IF ANYTHING.

"I'M THE VICTIM OF MY OWN CHOICES!"
YEAH. 

NOT MY CHOICES, YOUR OWN CHOICES.

AND WHEN I POINT THAT OUT?
"TOXIC!"

GROSS.