Facts, Just Facts

I read something in a group I'm in. 
Someone saying they have "difficulties" accepting loss
and that it's so bad it throws their regulatory system off etc. 

LOSING IS A PART OF LIFE. 
CAN'T FKN WIN ALL THE TIME. 

IF I COULD... WHERE DO YOU THINK I'D BE? HERE?!

Sure, it bugged me to lose etc. 

But 1) He was talking about the World Series. 

IT'S A GAME. NOT LIFE OR DEATH.

But look how many times I "lost" in my life... 
SHOULD I HAVE LET THOSE LOSSES
RUIN MY LIFE? MY MOOD?
MY THINKING?
MY HEALTH?
ANYTHING FOR ME?

It's going with what I was saying about facts. 
WHEN YOU TREAT FACTS AS THOUGH THEY ARE FACTS
THEN THAT'S ALL THEY ARE AND HAVE TO BE. 
THEY DON'T NEED TO BE ANYTHING OTHER
THAN A FACT. 

SO WHY ANYONE WOULD BE UPSET WITH ME
ABOUT JUST STATING FACTS... ???

LIKE THEY ARE WITH OTHER PEOPLE WHO
STATE FACTS THEY DON'T LIKE...

I got a call with a BC area code and didn't answer it. 

I got a bunch of collection calls for my ex. 
Already told them that he and I haven't lived together
since like 2016.... 

But is it the fault of the fact for being a fact?
Because if it's not, the fact's still a fact.

So why blame the fact for being a fact?
And what blame me for stating a fact?

Should I blame someone else for stating a fact?
OR IS IT JUST A FACT
THAT THEY STATED A FACT?

GET WHERE I'M GOING WITH THAT?
SO WHY BE MAD ABOUT THAT?

If it's just a fact, why feel any type of way about it?
IS THERE ANYTHING SAYING THAT I HAVE TO
FEEL/SHOW/DISPLAY XYZ 
ABOUT XYZ?

NO! IT'S WHATEVER IS "EXPECTED"
THAT'S ALL THAT'S SAYING 
THAT I HAVE TO... 

AND MAYBE I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO XYZ
JUST BECAUSE I'M "EXPECTED" TO... 

You know what I'm saying, though?

Sometimes I wonder if anyone actually gets it. 

But something I said, whatever it was, was enough
to earn someone a free dinner... 

So at least, whatever that was that I said, made sense. 

No idea what it was that I said, but as long as it helped. 

Helped whoever got the dinner and gave it lol. 

"You helped me so much, here's a dinner." LOL. 
I'd take that. 

STILL the best compliment I ever got btw.

I think what bugs me the most about everything 
that happened between mirror smasher and I

IS THAT I WAS LITERALLY THE ONLY ONE
WHO WAS ACTUALLY THERE FOR HIM. 

I TOLD HIM THE TRUTH. 
THE PEOPLE AROUND HIM JUST USE HIM. 
HE LETS THEM, BUT THEY DO. 

HE CHOSE THAT. 

THE ONE PERSON WHO WASN'T
AND FKN WOULDN'T, 
HE PUSHED AWAY. 

So he doesn't get to just say:
"I made a mistake."

BECAUSE HE ALREADY HAD HIS
SECOND CHANCE, HIS THIRD, HIS FOURTH ETC... 

IF YOU FK SOMEONE OVER
WHO COULD HAVE BEEN AND SHOULD HAVE BEEN
TRUSTED... AND NOT DONE DIRTY... 

WHY SHOULD THEY FKN TRUST YOU?
TRUST YOU NOT TO DO IT AGAIN?
AFTER YOU ALREADY DID?

AFTER THEY TRUSTED YOU NOT TO XYZ?
IN THE FIRST PLACE?

LOTS OF THINGS I TRUSTED HIM NOT TO DO.

THINGS HE WENT AHEAD AND DID ANYWAY. 

WITH ZERO FKS GIVEN... 

SO WHY SHOULD I GIVE ANY? NOW?

BUT WHEN SOMEONE TAKES YOU FOR GRANTED
UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE.... 

IT'S STILL TOO LATE!!!! 

When someone can't be trusted not to xyz... 
What can they be trusted with?

Couldn't trust him to just fkn pay me back.... 
Couldn't trust him not to be fkn' around... 

WITH FEMALES WHO WERE JEALOUS LOL... 

AND THEY'RE AS SELFISH AS HE IS SO
THEY CAN ENJOY THEMSELVES LOL. 

Often I thought I was the selfish one
FOR JUST WANTING TO BE 
TREATED PROPERLY. 

LIKE I FKN MATTERED. JUST THAT.
WAS THAT TOO MUCH TO WANT?

I REALLY NEVER THOUGH
HE'D EVER DO THAT SH*T TO ME.

IF I THOUGHT HE WOULD HAVE
I WOULD HAVE NEVER WASTED MY TIME. 
WHY WOULD I HAVE?

THERE ARE BETTER WAYS
TO INTENTIONALLY WASTE MY OWN TIME.
CORRECT?

WITH LESS BS?

But when they FINALLY realize that YOU
WERE THE ONE IN THEIR CORNER... 

THE ONLY FKN ONE... 
WHO WOULDN'T HAVE BETRAYED THEM... 

FOR REASONS THAT SHOULD HAVE ALREADY BEEN KNOWN....

AT LEAST KNOWN... 

But when THE ONE PERSON WALKS TF AWAY
TO LEAVE YOU ALL ALONE
IN THE MESS YOU MADE... 

THEN, IT'S TOO LATE. 
THEY PROBABLY DON'T WANT TO COME BACK.
FOR MORE ABUSE? NO.

I literally could have bounced tf out years ago.
THE FIRST OUNCE OF DISRESPECT.

BUT WHAT DID I DO?
I KEPT TRYING. 

FOR HOPE THEY WOULD FKN SEE WHY I STILL FKN TRIED... 
WHY I EVER TRIED... 

BUT JUST BECAUSE YOU HOPE FOR THAT, JUST THAT, 
DOESN'T MEAN IT'LL HAPPEN! 

CORRECT?! 

Because if it worked like that... I'd just hope my way... 
RIGHT INTO EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED. 
IN GENERAL. 

Because nothing needed to be twisted. 
INTO SOMETHING IT WASN'T
AND NEVER HAD TO BE. 

COULD HAVE JUST BEEN SIMPLE
AND SO FKN EASY. 

FOR FKN ONCE. BUT WAS IT?

It bugs me THAT WHEN I'M ACTUALLY TRYING
NOBODY SEES IT UNTIL I'M FKN NOT ANYMORE. 

"Don't know what you've got until it's gone... "

And even when I'm gone?

BUT THEY MISS THE THINGS I DID FOR THEM. 
THEY MISS THINGS ABOUT ME. 

THEY DON'T KNOW ME WELL ENOUGH
TO ACTUALLY MISS ME. 

That bugs me probably the most. 
BECAUSE I'M NOT THE THINGS I EVER DID
FOR FKN ANYONE. 
I'M NOT THERE FOR FKN CONVENIENCE ONLY. 
JUST TO BE A FKN PUSHOVER. 

AND THE MINUTE I FKN SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT
THEY TRY TO "BANISH" ME LIKE I WAS THE PROBLEM. 

NO. THE PROBLEM IS I DON'T WANT TO BE USED. 
AND YOU WANTED TO USE ME. 

YOU AS IN FKN ANYONE
WHO SHOULDN'T HAVE A PROBLEM
WITH THE FACT I DON'T WANT TO BE USED. 

ONLY PEOPLE WHO WANT TO USE YOU
WILL HAVE AN ISSUE WITH THAT!!!!

BECAUSE IT MEANS THEY CAN'T GET 
WHATEVER TF THEY WERE TRYING TO USE YOU
TO GET. 

OTHERWISE WHAT? THERE'D BE NO ISSUE!!!
WHY? BECAUSE THEY DON'T FKN WANT
ANYTHING FROM YOU!!!!
THE WAY IT SHOULD BE!!!!

AND EVEN IF I WANTED ANYTHING
ARE THEY FKN OBLIGATED TO GIVE ME ANYTHING?
NO?

THAT MEANS.... NEITHER AM I!
THAT MEANS.... NEITHER ARE YOU! 

So then? WHY SHOULD THEY BE TRYING TO ACT
LIKE I'M FKN OBLIGATED
TO DO WHATEVER TF THEY WANT
WHILE NOT EVEN FKN RESPECTING ME?

RESPECTING WHAT IT IS I WANTED IN THE FIRST PLACE?

YET THEY HAVE/HAD MORE RESPECT FOR THOSE
WHO DISRESPECTED THEM!!!! 
THAN THEY HAD/HAVE FOR ME!!! 

SO WHY SHOULD I HAVE RESPECT FOR THAT?
FOR THEM?

BUT THEY WANT TO BE MAD THAT I LOST RESPECT?

WHAT DID THEY DO TO KEEP IT?
WHEN THEY HAD IT?

DID THEY RESPECT ME? IN RETURN?