Just been scattered, feeling, thinking... I get headaches. I am tired.
Been wanting to read more and relax more. Too much on my mind, I guess.
I have to let some stuff go. It's hard. Really hard.
It's like part of me wants to be hopeful,
but at the same time I can't really expect anything.
If that makes sense. I think it does.
Whenever I've had expectations, I've always been disappointed, anyway.
I mean, it'd be nice to have things to look forward to,
but I rarely do. So even when I think I do, I want to get excited,
but when I get excited about things, I tend to get let down,
so I'm trying to experiement with this.
By giving myself things to look forward to and be excited about.
Thought experiments. Exercises in imagination.
It's more or less to gain more control over my own reactions to things.
And to help me shift my focus to other things.
I don't know why I get stuck on certain things.
My mind wants to latch onto some things, it seems.
Probably because the outcome wasn't what I was hoping for.
I'm thinking about training my mind better.
It's like a puppy with a stick.
You can tell the puppy "Drop it!" "Leave it!"
The puppy won't always listen, but when it learns, it does.
Puppies respond well to rewards for listening.
And praises, lots of praises. Positive reinforcement.
So when you're programming your mind, or training it,
gotta give yourself rewards and praise, and positive reinforcements.
It's just that we're not used to giving ourselves these.
If anything, we give ourselves negative reinforcements, constantly.
Which doesn't make us want to do any better than we have been.
We look to others for stuff like "Good job!" Etc.
How often do we tell ourselves: "Great job! You're doing awesome!"
"You're kicking ass!" "Keep going!" "Almost there!" Etc. ?
We don't tend to encourage ourselves, but it does make a difference.
Instead of wishing for or wanting others to encourage us.
Because chances are they won't. They probably don't encourage themselves, either.
Encouragement is important. It really helps.
I don't encourage myself as much as I should. I should. We all should.
When we get good at it, we can teach others how to encourage themselves.
Instead of always looking for it from others and not finding any.
That's what self-help is about. Giving ourselves the support we need.
So that we never have to look 'out there' or to anyone.
Because, honestly, most people just do not give a 'fuck'
and most people do not have any support. From anyone.
Certain things make a huge difference. When we start doing those things
for ourselves, we really support and help ourselves.
To get over stuff, get through stuff, carry on, keep going etc.
It's all stuff I wish I had started doing a long time ago, but it's not too late.
Too late is when we give up.
I've spent too much time sabotaging myself
and not enough time supporting myself.
It's possible to learn. It's possible to do it.
It's about doing it a little bit each day, then doing it more and more.
Until doing it becomes a habit.
It matters what we say to ourselves because we're always listening.
Been wanting to read more and relax more. Too much on my mind, I guess.
I have to let some stuff go. It's hard. Really hard.
It's like part of me wants to be hopeful,
but at the same time I can't really expect anything.
If that makes sense. I think it does.
Whenever I've had expectations, I've always been disappointed, anyway.
I mean, it'd be nice to have things to look forward to,
but I rarely do. So even when I think I do, I want to get excited,
but when I get excited about things, I tend to get let down,
so I'm trying to experiement with this.
By giving myself things to look forward to and be excited about.
Thought experiments. Exercises in imagination.
It's more or less to gain more control over my own reactions to things.
And to help me shift my focus to other things.
I don't know why I get stuck on certain things.
My mind wants to latch onto some things, it seems.
Probably because the outcome wasn't what I was hoping for.
I'm thinking about training my mind better.
It's like a puppy with a stick.
You can tell the puppy "Drop it!" "Leave it!"
The puppy won't always listen, but when it learns, it does.
Puppies respond well to rewards for listening.
And praises, lots of praises. Positive reinforcement.
So when you're programming your mind, or training it,
gotta give yourself rewards and praise, and positive reinforcements.
It's just that we're not used to giving ourselves these.
If anything, we give ourselves negative reinforcements, constantly.
Which doesn't make us want to do any better than we have been.
We look to others for stuff like "Good job!" Etc.
How often do we tell ourselves: "Great job! You're doing awesome!"
"You're kicking ass!" "Keep going!" "Almost there!" Etc. ?
We don't tend to encourage ourselves, but it does make a difference.
Instead of wishing for or wanting others to encourage us.
Because chances are they won't. They probably don't encourage themselves, either.
Encouragement is important. It really helps.
I don't encourage myself as much as I should. I should. We all should.
When we get good at it, we can teach others how to encourage themselves.
Instead of always looking for it from others and not finding any.
That's what self-help is about. Giving ourselves the support we need.
So that we never have to look 'out there' or to anyone.
Because, honestly, most people just do not give a 'fuck'
and most people do not have any support. From anyone.
Certain things make a huge difference. When we start doing those things
for ourselves, we really support and help ourselves.
To get over stuff, get through stuff, carry on, keep going etc.
It's all stuff I wish I had started doing a long time ago, but it's not too late.
Too late is when we give up.
I've spent too much time sabotaging myself
and not enough time supporting myself.
It's possible to learn. It's possible to do it.
It's about doing it a little bit each day, then doing it more and more.
Until doing it becomes a habit.
It matters what we say to ourselves because we're always listening.
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