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Monday, December 31, 2018

Last Day Of 2018

Leaning heavily towards music today. I don't usually practice singing,
but today, I did. I'm picking up the guitar soon and will practice on that,
but this year it'll be more about practicing the actual chords and that stuff.
Also, I think that joining a choir would be good for me.

There's a quote by Bruce Lee:
"I fear not a man who practiced 1,000 kicks once,
but a man who has practiced 1 kick 1,000 times."

It will be about practicing and things like this, this year.
About cultivating my mind and feeling better than I ever have.
Without all these emotional reactions engaging me.
I didn't have any this morning. Probably because I was practicing.
My attention was on that and not on things that happened.
We can direct and redirect our attention, our energy.
It's also going to be more about concentration. Focusing in certain areas.
If it takes all year, then it takes all year, but I want to beat these habits.
They've consumed so much of me, my life, I want my power and to use it.
Instead of feeling powerless and at the mercy of my own thoughts and reactions.
I can't just practice 1,000 things once. I have to practice something 1,000 times.
And there are only 365 days in a year. So then it will be a few years,
if you practice one thing each day. Or a few things....
I never counted how many times I've picked up the knitting needles
or how many times I picked up the crochet hook, how many hats I've made,
or how many hours went into the blankets I've made.
I have those skills, but I want more skills and I want these skills
to become abilities that I can use to my advantage.

Yes, I can write... I've written over 3,400 blog posts on this blog.
Over the span of 14 years.... I've written maybe as many poems.
When you do something every day, or most days, it adds up. It really does.
Same goes for practicing, the more we practice, the more we improve.
I've always enjoyed writing, since I learned how to write.
The assignments at school, using my imagination, freedom to write
basically whatever I wanted to write. Nobody was telling me "don't write."
They were telling me not to be myself, to be how they wanted me to be etc.
But nobody ever told me not to write. It's been very important to me.

I appreciate being able to do the things that I'm able to do.
But I'm aware that I can become able to do all kinds of things.
To become able to do those things, I have to learn how to do those things.
There are people who resign to the fact they aren't able to do certain things.
They won't practice, they won't put the time and effort into learning how.
Like they somehow think that we are or aren't able.
Everyone who is able had to become able.
They couldn't just pick up a guitar and just play it.
They couldn't just open their mouth to sign.
Everything they learned, they had to learn and it often took years.
It's not like we either have it or we don't.
We don't and then we acquire it through practice etc.

What are you going to practice in 2019?

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