I'm pretty tired. My ex was calling here all night because one of my friends was over here. I didn't even want to tell him my friend was over because he gets so jealous and possessive of me. Part of the reason we broke up in the first place... Most of the reason I don't want to date anymore... Why I gave up on the whole 'finding the one" stuff. I could care less about it now. Part of me is sad, but the rest moves on like I've always moved on.
I think it's weird, guys like me way more when all my interest is gone... Why do they even bother to still try? My ex for example, the more he tries to get into my face the more I push him away. Like he all of a sudden shows he cares AFTER I break up with him? He's trying harder now to get me back than the whole time we were together. But this jealousy thing just bothers me. Because he doesn't want me to have friends over... Or he'll keep calling and calling all night... Like he wants me all to himself all the time and it's not going to happen. Just because it won't happen doesn't stop him from trying and trying and trying... When does persistence become harassment? Harassment is interference. Friends can't influence a friend's social life. It just doesn't work that way. Maybe I meant control, not influence.
I decided dating isn't worth that anymore. The jealousy, the phone calls that don't stop (stalking) or the way any guy tries to make me feel bad for hanging out with a friend. If I have a friend who they don't want me to hang out with, it is none of their business. I don't want people making choices for me. If I make the wrong choices, that is my business. Not theirs. Because it is my life, not theirs.
On another note, it is very windy tonight. Already getting late... I should be in bed, but I have a feeling the phone will ring again. If it doesn't, maybe I can catch some sleep tonight.
I think it's weird, guys like me way more when all my interest is gone... Why do they even bother to still try? My ex for example, the more he tries to get into my face the more I push him away. Like he all of a sudden shows he cares AFTER I break up with him? He's trying harder now to get me back than the whole time we were together. But this jealousy thing just bothers me. Because he doesn't want me to have friends over... Or he'll keep calling and calling all night... Like he wants me all to himself all the time and it's not going to happen. Just because it won't happen doesn't stop him from trying and trying and trying... When does persistence become harassment? Harassment is interference. Friends can't influence a friend's social life. It just doesn't work that way. Maybe I meant control, not influence.
I decided dating isn't worth that anymore. The jealousy, the phone calls that don't stop (stalking) or the way any guy tries to make me feel bad for hanging out with a friend. If I have a friend who they don't want me to hang out with, it is none of their business. I don't want people making choices for me. If I make the wrong choices, that is my business. Not theirs. Because it is my life, not theirs.
On another note, it is very windy tonight. Already getting late... I should be in bed, but I have a feeling the phone will ring again. If it doesn't, maybe I can catch some sleep tonight.
sounds confusing...you probably don't need that. People are strange...You have to show just enough interest or else they're out.
ReplyDeleteYou are right, people are strange. Jealousy and possessiveness is a big turn off for me. The friend who was visiting me the other night said that life is hectic enough without thinking about dating. It's for the best that I'm single. I don't want to end up in a relationship like this again.
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