Something crossed my mind today... So I thought it would be good to share it.
When I toy with concepts, notions, ideas, etc, they toy with me!
Then they keep toying with me when I let them.
I hadn't thought about this before. It's literally an original thought.
Well, maybe someone else could have reached the same conclusion,
but it's something that never crossed my mind until today.
I become a toy to my mind because I haven't been able to have more control.
I was thinking about attachment today. How I've been so attached to the outcomes.
Which is why it is important for me to work on surrendering them.
Giving up my attachment to these things. My thoughts, stuff, pain, etc.
I don't even know why I felt the need to be attached to them anyway.
Even saying this, I know that these habits that we have that are subconscious...
aren't the easiest habits to break. Even conscious habits are hard to break.
It's not like I'm consciouslsly choosing to attach myself to these.
Maybe to some of it, but definitely not all of it.
There's so much below the surface, in the subconscious.
There's everything, every waking moment, everything locked in there.
It's just not something we know how to readily access.
It's not like we learn this stuff in school
"Today boys and girls, we are going to learn how to access your subconscious."
I think one way, besides hypnosis, is to talk to it. Ask it questions.
There's a tarot card that comes to my mind when I think about the subconscious.
It's The High Priestess Card. Secrets revealed, mysteries uncovered.
There are some parts... "Vestiges of ideas that can only appear
in conciousness as dreams or intuitions and are difficult
to piece together into a coherent pattern."
On the card, The High Priestess is protecting and hiding the unconscious.
"which contains many hidden treasures."
See sits between the pillars of opposites. She is the filter through
which creative ideas and intuitions can pass.
The card signifies: "It is a time for uncovering secrets and finding out
about aspects of both yourself and life in general.
Something is gestating in the depts of your unconscious
and although you may be aware that something is happening,
it is not possible to know consciously what it is
until the moment of its birth."
The reason I thought of this card is because "The High Priestess
must be approached with patience and sensitivity,
otherwise she will not reveal her secrets."
Well, you must approach your subconscious with patience and sensitivity
or it will not reveal its secrets.
The thing is that either we want to know what is in there, or we don't.
Many of us are afraid of the unknown so we won't venture into it.
We tend to prefer what we are already aware of.
Over what we aren't aware of. Out of fear that what we don't know is bad.
Or somehow going to hurt us. Even destroy us.
However, what we don't know isn't always going to hurt us, or destroy us.
Some things we don't know can heal us, help us,
and ultimately save us from destroying ourselves.
Some things we need to know for our rebirth.
Birth is a painful process. Having given birth, I know it's painful for the mother.
But we don't consider that it might also be painful for the child.
We don't consciously remember our own births.
And we can't ask our newly born child if it hurt being born.
Pain isn't anything that they can even articulate until they learn
how to articulate things. So they may feel it
but don't know what they are experiencing.
And being born, coming into the world is scary.
But they don't even know they are experiencing fear.
Fear is something we are taught. Everything.
Going from the womb which is all they had experienced for 9 months.
Out into the world. Rebirth is a scary and painful experience, too.
Ripped from the 'womb' where we've been gestating...
From this world, to the next. We can die before we actually physically die.
By being reborn. I'm not talking about "Born Again Christians"
It has nothing to do with religion. Not at all.
This is a spirituality thing. We can be spiritual without being religious.
Spirituality and religion are two different and separate things to me.
People mistake them all the time.
Thinking that being religious means they are spiritual.
People don't have to put all their faith into religion.
If they want to, that's what they want. I'm not telling anyone what to want.
If anything I'm just stating what I believe and what I think and feel about things.
Everyone has their own stuff. I'm not saying don't have your stuff, it's yours.
I'm just saying I've had stuff and have stuff I do not need.
I'm discovering what I need! What I've needed!
And it's not what I thought it was! Why is that?
Because my thoughts are heavily influenced.
Instead of me having any influence over my own thoughts!
Why is this? Because I've been closed off!
Why is this? Because I had no reason to open up!
Well now I do. Because opening up is opening my eyes,
opening my mind, my heart, my soul.
And just because I open my heart doesn't mean I have to give it away.
I can love without needing to be or being in love.
I've had a distorted idea and concept of love.
That's why I haven't been able to love fully and completely.
I didn't even know what love even was. Most don't. Sadly.
When I toy with concepts, notions, ideas, etc, they toy with me!
Then they keep toying with me when I let them.
I hadn't thought about this before. It's literally an original thought.
Well, maybe someone else could have reached the same conclusion,
but it's something that never crossed my mind until today.
I become a toy to my mind because I haven't been able to have more control.
I was thinking about attachment today. How I've been so attached to the outcomes.
Which is why it is important for me to work on surrendering them.
Giving up my attachment to these things. My thoughts, stuff, pain, etc.
I don't even know why I felt the need to be attached to them anyway.
Even saying this, I know that these habits that we have that are subconscious...
aren't the easiest habits to break. Even conscious habits are hard to break.
It's not like I'm consciouslsly choosing to attach myself to these.
Maybe to some of it, but definitely not all of it.
There's so much below the surface, in the subconscious.
There's everything, every waking moment, everything locked in there.
It's just not something we know how to readily access.
It's not like we learn this stuff in school
"Today boys and girls, we are going to learn how to access your subconscious."
I think one way, besides hypnosis, is to talk to it. Ask it questions.
There's a tarot card that comes to my mind when I think about the subconscious.
It's The High Priestess Card. Secrets revealed, mysteries uncovered.
There are some parts... "Vestiges of ideas that can only appear
in conciousness as dreams or intuitions and are difficult
to piece together into a coherent pattern."
On the card, The High Priestess is protecting and hiding the unconscious.
"which contains many hidden treasures."
See sits between the pillars of opposites. She is the filter through
which creative ideas and intuitions can pass.
The card signifies: "It is a time for uncovering secrets and finding out
about aspects of both yourself and life in general.
Something is gestating in the depts of your unconscious
and although you may be aware that something is happening,
it is not possible to know consciously what it is
until the moment of its birth."
The reason I thought of this card is because "The High Priestess
must be approached with patience and sensitivity,
otherwise she will not reveal her secrets."
Well, you must approach your subconscious with patience and sensitivity
or it will not reveal its secrets.
The thing is that either we want to know what is in there, or we don't.
Many of us are afraid of the unknown so we won't venture into it.
We tend to prefer what we are already aware of.
Over what we aren't aware of. Out of fear that what we don't know is bad.
Or somehow going to hurt us. Even destroy us.
However, what we don't know isn't always going to hurt us, or destroy us.
Some things we don't know can heal us, help us,
and ultimately save us from destroying ourselves.
Some things we need to know for our rebirth.
Birth is a painful process. Having given birth, I know it's painful for the mother.
But we don't consider that it might also be painful for the child.
We don't consciously remember our own births.
And we can't ask our newly born child if it hurt being born.
Pain isn't anything that they can even articulate until they learn
how to articulate things. So they may feel it
but don't know what they are experiencing.
And being born, coming into the world is scary.
But they don't even know they are experiencing fear.
Fear is something we are taught. Everything.
Going from the womb which is all they had experienced for 9 months.
Out into the world. Rebirth is a scary and painful experience, too.
Ripped from the 'womb' where we've been gestating...
From this world, to the next. We can die before we actually physically die.
By being reborn. I'm not talking about "Born Again Christians"
It has nothing to do with religion. Not at all.
This is a spirituality thing. We can be spiritual without being religious.
Spirituality and religion are two different and separate things to me.
People mistake them all the time.
Thinking that being religious means they are spiritual.
People don't have to put all their faith into religion.
If they want to, that's what they want. I'm not telling anyone what to want.
If anything I'm just stating what I believe and what I think and feel about things.
Everyone has their own stuff. I'm not saying don't have your stuff, it's yours.
I'm just saying I've had stuff and have stuff I do not need.
I'm discovering what I need! What I've needed!
And it's not what I thought it was! Why is that?
Because my thoughts are heavily influenced.
Instead of me having any influence over my own thoughts!
Why is this? Because I've been closed off!
Why is this? Because I had no reason to open up!
Well now I do. Because opening up is opening my eyes,
opening my mind, my heart, my soul.
And just because I open my heart doesn't mean I have to give it away.
I can love without needing to be or being in love.
I've had a distorted idea and concept of love.
That's why I haven't been able to love fully and completely.
I didn't even know what love even was. Most don't. Sadly.
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