"If You Can't Find What You're Looking For"

Went to the mall today to pick up some tomatoes.
I love a good tomato sandwich.
Store tomatoes are a lot different from farm ones though.

Anyway, I also went to get a latte. I don't usually drink those,
but I was given a coffee card so I thought why not get something special?
I latte'd it a lot :P

So I was leaving the mall and I happened to see a sign
that was at the back of a store that I probably wouldn't shop in.
There's a lot of clothing stores in the mall. It was a clothing store.
I haven't bought new clothes in a long time.

Anyway, the sign said:
"If you can't find what you're looking for we can order it."
It made me think of the time that I placed an 'order' with the Universe.
It made me chuckle.

Been thinking about some other stuff...
Some things that have been on my mind for a while.
Most of it is a matter of looking at it differently and looking at other things.
Really, it should be the last things on my mind.
I have a lot of other things to think about and think over.

Been thinking about role playing actually.
I know someone who does it to cope with pain. Physical pain.
Been thinking it would be a good way to use my imagination.
It's nothing sexual or whatever. It's totally not about that.
It's more like choosing what role would suit me.
Like what role do I want to play in my own life?
Nothing ridiculous or anything.

More like picturing what it would be like to have certain qualities
that I don't actually have. Or think that I don't have.
Stuff like confidence etc. Things like that.

I know the ol' "Just be yourself" stuff. Just been thinking about it is all.
The quote today got me thinking of it, too. It goes:
"First say to yourself what you would be,
then do what you have to do."
-Epictetus

It makes me think of the BE-DO-HAVE paradigm.
"If I am who I want to be,
and do the things that make me happy,
I will have people in my life to share the happiness with."

Also I watched a movie with a friend tonight.
There was a theme to it which was the quest to save the princess and the unicorn.
There was a devil in it and it made me think of two cards from the tarot.
One being the Devil card, which is the card for the sign of capricorn.
I'm a Capricorn. Capricorns are 'goats' and goats have horns.
The theme of that card is 'power imprisoned'

There's a card from another deck that has a unicorn on it.
It's theme is 'Free Yourself.'
Then tonight, I was looking at a stack on index cards I have with notes on them.
I was looking at one that has a list of cards I picked for each month of the year.
Was for last year, but I looked at the October card and it is 8 of swords.
Which is about freeing yourself.
The theme is "Difficulties in becoming free from restriction."
The main message being that it's self-restriction.

"Solutions do exist if you can only remove your blindfold to look for them."
And a sign will soon be coming my way.
I pay attention to the signs I see. But sometimes it's not an actual sign.
Just something that signifies something.
I like the number 8. It's a regeneration number.
Infinity regenerating itself. Infinitely.

Anyway, it's really late here. The traffic has already started this morning.
I'm probably going to have a hard time sleeping, again.