Well, things are in the works and that's all I can say at this point. Because I know what everyone would say if I told them before things were finalized. I have to expect people to have their reservations, to be afraid for me, to be concerned about me.
In the end, I have to make my own choices. Even if they are big decisions that can be a bit scary at first. The thing is about opportunities and about people is that people are afraid to take chances. I have to admit I am, too. But, I also think that things happen for a reason.
Either a blessing or a lesson. Sometimes it's a little of both. Sometimes we have to do things we never thought we'd do or things other people think that we shouldn't do to see that there was never anything to really worry about at all. People who are afraid to take chances will often try to bring out the fear in other people about taking a chance.
I don't want to do things for the wrong reasons. Because I have before. I want to do things for the right reasons and know that ALL my reasons are right. I don't want to do things for purely selfish reasons. Because that's not how or who I am.
There are times I took chances that turned out all wrong, but there were times I took chances that went very well. All in all, I've learned from ALL chances I've ever taken in my life. I've learned from my mistakes, I've learned from things that weren't mistakes. I've learned. I am where I am today because of everything I've been through. Even DESPITE everything I've been through because there's been A LOT going on in my 30 years on this earth. Not as much as some, but at the same time more than some others.
Everyone wants to be happy. Everyone. I've gone out of my way to make other people happy. I guess 'make' isn't the right word, but all I've ever wanted was for everyone I care about to be happy. I feel like I deserve to be happy too, for once in my life. Something to go right for me. Not that things have never gone right for me, there have been times things have gone really well, like I say.
Just I have made sacrifices for others' sake MANY times. I have hopes and dreams for the future. And sometimes. Well, most often than not, things will not happen until you ALLOW/MAKE them (to) happen. Also, I know that, from past experiences, I've regretted not taking some chances because TO THIS DAY, I wonder how things would have turned out. And I have to STOP wondering so damn much because I know that if things were meant to happen, they would have happened. On the same note, things that were not meant to happen, just didn't and won't happen.
So this is a chance and opportunity that I've probably been waiting for a LONG time for and a LOT of things could go RIGHT no matter what anyone else says. They can try to warn me all they want, but I know that they are warning me because often THEY are the ones who are afraid of taking chances, they see the risks and nothing else. The more risks they see, the more fear they will have, until they just talk themselves out of it.
You never know until you try. And THAT is the bottom line.
There is nothing wrong with having faith and having hope that things do work out.
But... We can't keep wondering our whole lives what it would have been like had we done the things we wanted to do, that we were too afraid to do (especially because we listened to all the people out there who said it wasn't a good idea). It boils down to the fact that if it's YOUR life (which it is), then it's YOUR life. (Which it is).
I have some other stuff to write about, but now is not the time. Now is the time to rest up to deal with the stuff I need to deal with.
In the end, I have to make my own choices. Even if they are big decisions that can be a bit scary at first. The thing is about opportunities and about people is that people are afraid to take chances. I have to admit I am, too. But, I also think that things happen for a reason.
Either a blessing or a lesson. Sometimes it's a little of both. Sometimes we have to do things we never thought we'd do or things other people think that we shouldn't do to see that there was never anything to really worry about at all. People who are afraid to take chances will often try to bring out the fear in other people about taking a chance.
I don't want to do things for the wrong reasons. Because I have before. I want to do things for the right reasons and know that ALL my reasons are right. I don't want to do things for purely selfish reasons. Because that's not how or who I am.
There are times I took chances that turned out all wrong, but there were times I took chances that went very well. All in all, I've learned from ALL chances I've ever taken in my life. I've learned from my mistakes, I've learned from things that weren't mistakes. I've learned. I am where I am today because of everything I've been through. Even DESPITE everything I've been through because there's been A LOT going on in my 30 years on this earth. Not as much as some, but at the same time more than some others.
Everyone wants to be happy. Everyone. I've gone out of my way to make other people happy. I guess 'make' isn't the right word, but all I've ever wanted was for everyone I care about to be happy. I feel like I deserve to be happy too, for once in my life. Something to go right for me. Not that things have never gone right for me, there have been times things have gone really well, like I say.
Just I have made sacrifices for others' sake MANY times. I have hopes and dreams for the future. And sometimes. Well, most often than not, things will not happen until you ALLOW/MAKE them (to) happen. Also, I know that, from past experiences, I've regretted not taking some chances because TO THIS DAY, I wonder how things would have turned out. And I have to STOP wondering so damn much because I know that if things were meant to happen, they would have happened. On the same note, things that were not meant to happen, just didn't and won't happen.
So this is a chance and opportunity that I've probably been waiting for a LONG time for and a LOT of things could go RIGHT no matter what anyone else says. They can try to warn me all they want, but I know that they are warning me because often THEY are the ones who are afraid of taking chances, they see the risks and nothing else. The more risks they see, the more fear they will have, until they just talk themselves out of it.
You never know until you try. And THAT is the bottom line.
There is nothing wrong with having faith and having hope that things do work out.
But... We can't keep wondering our whole lives what it would have been like had we done the things we wanted to do, that we were too afraid to do (especially because we listened to all the people out there who said it wasn't a good idea). It boils down to the fact that if it's YOUR life (which it is), then it's YOUR life. (Which it is).
I have some other stuff to write about, but now is not the time. Now is the time to rest up to deal with the stuff I need to deal with.
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