One more week of parenting class and I cannot wait for it to be OVER. I was late to get there tonight and as soon as I walk in, they start with me. Already I was in a bad mood because I had the most TERRIFIC day (sarcasm understated).
Here's me walking in, and sitting down at the table.... "Hi Abby," Yeah I already know I'm late and they want to make a big deal about that... I forget what they said next. Asked me if I was cold.
"Not happy is what I am." I say. "Oh you're angry, want to talk about it?" Like I want to talk about my stuff in front of the whole class for one. For two, I don't want to talk about my stuff to someone I DO NOT TRUST. At break, one of the ladies sits next to me and was patting me on the back, trying to get me to talk to her. All I said was that I have to work after the class. Nothing else except for "I don't want to talk." You can't make someone talk to someone they don't trust. You can't make someone talk if they don't want to. She had no right to come pat me on the back like she's my friend or something. She didn't ask me. She had no right to touch me at all. That insulted me. She's not my friend. She is NOBODY to ME.
A couple weeks into the class she confronted me about my acne. That was insulting to me. She made it seem like I can't take care of myself and therefore can't take care of my kid BECAUSE I HAVE ACNE. IT DOESN'T GO AWAY OVER NIGHT! People can't MAGICALLY help someone and make it go away. It was insulting because I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING I CAN THINK OF. And insulting because I am the ONLY ONE in the group that has acne.
Do you know how many times I get people asking me about it? "WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE?!" This is what I get from pretty much EVERYONE. ALL THE TIME. I couldn't even make it through MY BIRTHDAY without someone asking me about it. The ONE DAY I don't want to hear about it...
There's a lot more to it than that. There always has been. I HATE C.A.S! I F*CKING HATE THEM. They are always "We're here to HELP YOU." And do they? NO! They do everything to what THEY WANT. Pretty much EVERY WORKER I have EVER had, didn't have ANY KIDS. So it is OKAY for them (with no personal experience to tell YOU (with personal experience) HOW to RAISE YOUR kids. No personal experience? NO PROBLEM! We've got the PERFECT job for YOU! Be a SOCIAL WORKER for the C.A.S! Insensitive? Even BETTER! Ignorant? YUP, we want YOU!
And to top it off... Tonight the topic was ABUSE. Yeah, after 8 YEARS of BEING ABUSED and nobody HELPING ME, I really want to talk about THAT! They let someone who LET their KID be ABUSED for 8 YEARS KEEP THEIR KIDS, but not someone who ISN'T abusive... That's another thing that pisses me OFF!
Yes, I am ANGRY, that I have to take a parenting class and MY EX DOESN'T! Is he NOT a PARENT, TOO? Shouldn't HE? He had NO IDEA what he was getting into. YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE HE HAD NO IDEA WHAT I WAS GOING THROUGH. YOU KNOW WHY HE DIDN'T KNOW? BECAUSE DESPITE ME ASKING FOR HIS HELP WITH HIS SON, HE WASN'T THERE FOR ME, OR FOR HIS SON WHEN WE NEEDED HIM. And IF HE HAD BEEN, MY KID WOULD STILL BE WITH HIS MOTHER WHERE HE BELONGS!
Here's me walking in, and sitting down at the table.... "Hi Abby," Yeah I already know I'm late and they want to make a big deal about that... I forget what they said next. Asked me if I was cold.
"Not happy is what I am." I say. "Oh you're angry, want to talk about it?" Like I want to talk about my stuff in front of the whole class for one. For two, I don't want to talk about my stuff to someone I DO NOT TRUST. At break, one of the ladies sits next to me and was patting me on the back, trying to get me to talk to her. All I said was that I have to work after the class. Nothing else except for "I don't want to talk." You can't make someone talk to someone they don't trust. You can't make someone talk if they don't want to. She had no right to come pat me on the back like she's my friend or something. She didn't ask me. She had no right to touch me at all. That insulted me. She's not my friend. She is NOBODY to ME.
A couple weeks into the class she confronted me about my acne. That was insulting to me. She made it seem like I can't take care of myself and therefore can't take care of my kid BECAUSE I HAVE ACNE. IT DOESN'T GO AWAY OVER NIGHT! People can't MAGICALLY help someone and make it go away. It was insulting because I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING I CAN THINK OF. And insulting because I am the ONLY ONE in the group that has acne.
Do you know how many times I get people asking me about it? "WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE?!" This is what I get from pretty much EVERYONE. ALL THE TIME. I couldn't even make it through MY BIRTHDAY without someone asking me about it. The ONE DAY I don't want to hear about it...
There's a lot more to it than that. There always has been. I HATE C.A.S! I F*CKING HATE THEM. They are always "We're here to HELP YOU." And do they? NO! They do everything to what THEY WANT. Pretty much EVERY WORKER I have EVER had, didn't have ANY KIDS. So it is OKAY for them (with no personal experience to tell YOU (with personal experience) HOW to RAISE YOUR kids. No personal experience? NO PROBLEM! We've got the PERFECT job for YOU! Be a SOCIAL WORKER for the C.A.S! Insensitive? Even BETTER! Ignorant? YUP, we want YOU!
And to top it off... Tonight the topic was ABUSE. Yeah, after 8 YEARS of BEING ABUSED and nobody HELPING ME, I really want to talk about THAT! They let someone who LET their KID be ABUSED for 8 YEARS KEEP THEIR KIDS, but not someone who ISN'T abusive... That's another thing that pisses me OFF!
Yes, I am ANGRY, that I have to take a parenting class and MY EX DOESN'T! Is he NOT a PARENT, TOO? Shouldn't HE? He had NO IDEA what he was getting into. YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE HE HAD NO IDEA WHAT I WAS GOING THROUGH. YOU KNOW WHY HE DIDN'T KNOW? BECAUSE DESPITE ME ASKING FOR HIS HELP WITH HIS SON, HE WASN'T THERE FOR ME, OR FOR HIS SON WHEN WE NEEDED HIM. And IF HE HAD BEEN, MY KID WOULD STILL BE WITH HIS MOTHER WHERE HE BELONGS!
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