Hard Time Sleeping

I have to be awake in a couple of hours, been trying to sleep,
but it's not happening. Maybe when I get home...
I feel like even if I fall asleep soon, it won't even be enough.

Kind of like when I was coming in for my first shift,
I hadn't slept all night because I had to be there early.
And I was running on empty. I did it, though.
And yes, four hours can go by fast.
Be back here by noon, and sleep until I have to leave again.
It's still snowing out there... Most snow we've had all winter.
Coming at us at once. We'll see how the roads are in the morning.
Hopefully not so bad, but we'll see.
I'm going to be tired, but... I have to do what I have to do.
Been trying all night, just can't drift off. Too much on my mind.

It will be okay, though. Have to have faith that it'll all turn out well.
That all of it is for a reason. I don't know why, though.
Even all the crap. All of that, too.
All my own bullsh*t. All everyone's bullsh*t.
Everything. Absolutely everything.

I want to keep the good memories alive.
And just be thankful for the good times I've had.
Also the good times I will have. I will have more. I know I will.
I keep thinking I feel sad, but I'm actually really tired.
And tired of being tired.
And there are things I can't explain or tell anyone about.
But none of that really matters, I guess.

There's too much in there to just put into words, anyway.

Just been thinking too much, probably why I can't sleep.
Thinking about things that don't matter all that much.
Yet the thoughts keep coming at me and I don't know what to do about it
because I'm too tired to get them to stop.

I have to try again.