Tonight Daniel and I had dinner at a friend's place and it was nice. I've only been over once before. She hasn't been here. I'm too embarrassed I guess. Of how I live. Only the people who have been here know what I mean. It used to be worse. It could be worse. Just it could be better too. It's like I'm at a standstill with life. Have been for a long time. I know things could be different, but they aren't right now. Things have just stayed the same. Even though sometimes I feel differently.
Maybe it's me realizing the skills that I lack and actually care that the lacking of said skills is affecting my life. In all the ways that I don't want it to...
I want to be something of determined person. Because without determination, where would the human race even be? We would be so much further behind than we are. We would have none of the things we take for granted.
Anyway, it was good to see her again... We were friends when we were kids. She lived in the same neighborhood and went to the same school. I am a couple years younger, though. I always have looked up to her. I admire her a lot. She was the only one I had in my life when I was young. We used to be best friends. Until I had to move and I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye. I looked her up on Facebook and we've been starting to hang out again.
I'm glad that Christmas is coming, because it will pass quickly once it gets here. I've never been fond of Christmas. Maybe when I was a kid, I was... But not anymore. This is going to be my first Christmas without my Grandmother. We were supposed to have dinner Christmas Eve, but she is sick and unable to have visitors. Her sister, (my Great-Aunt Lois) passed away just on the 23rd. So that is just yesterday. My Grandfather also passed away on the 23rd in 1998. My Grandmother's Father (My Great-Grandfather) and her brother, (My Great-Uncle) had also passed away close to Christmas. Four people close to her who passed away near Christmas. It's always a hard time of year for her and I hate seeing her heartbroken. She tries to hide it, but I know it's there.
Maybe it's me realizing the skills that I lack and actually care that the lacking of said skills is affecting my life. In all the ways that I don't want it to...
I want to be something of determined person. Because without determination, where would the human race even be? We would be so much further behind than we are. We would have none of the things we take for granted.
Anyway, it was good to see her again... We were friends when we were kids. She lived in the same neighborhood and went to the same school. I am a couple years younger, though. I always have looked up to her. I admire her a lot. She was the only one I had in my life when I was young. We used to be best friends. Until I had to move and I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye. I looked her up on Facebook and we've been starting to hang out again.
I'm glad that Christmas is coming, because it will pass quickly once it gets here. I've never been fond of Christmas. Maybe when I was a kid, I was... But not anymore. This is going to be my first Christmas without my Grandmother. We were supposed to have dinner Christmas Eve, but she is sick and unable to have visitors. Her sister, (my Great-Aunt Lois) passed away just on the 23rd. So that is just yesterday. My Grandfather also passed away on the 23rd in 1998. My Grandmother's Father (My Great-Grandfather) and her brother, (My Great-Uncle) had also passed away close to Christmas. Four people close to her who passed away near Christmas. It's always a hard time of year for her and I hate seeing her heartbroken. She tries to hide it, but I know it's there.
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